Author: Gareth
Series: The Dawnmeister Chronicles
Summary: Dawn writes about the beginnings of her crush on Spike.
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: Season Four stuff only, apart from the existence of Dawn
Archive: List Archives are welcome to it, other people please ask.
Distribution: Sure, as long as you keep this header intact.
Feedback: Hell yeah :) I don't want to churn loads of stuff out then find out you all think it's crap :) Send to feedback[at]lostscrolls.net
Disclaimer: Dawn and co are all owned by one Joss Whedon. The latest in scientific research shows that there is only one Joss Whedon, and that my jokes along these lines in the disclaimers are wearing a little thin.
Notes: Although strictly speaking this shouldn't be on this list, I'm claiming the 'OT' tag in the heading lets me off ;) The last of four shorts (although there will now be a Year Five too) looking at events of the first four seasons through Dawn's eyes.
Blatant Hit Grabber: Rumours abound of a special extract from the Dawnmeister Chronicles that ties in with my Rebecca fic. According to the rumours there is a very obscure link hidden somewhere on the Lost Scrolls website (http://www.lostscrolls.net/).
Dear Diary,
I'm still coming here as often as I can. I don't talk so much now, just write these entries. I don't know when it was I decided that Faith wasn't listening. The idea that she'll wake up good if I say the right things to her while she's in the coma seems kinda dumb now. I've been coming here for months, and I guess she does look different now than when I started coming here, but each day she looks the same, you know what I mean? Each time I see her she looks the same as last time.
The worst thing is each time I come I see her face and obviously she looks like shit but she also looks kinda angry. You know how when you see someone asleep they look kinda peaceful? Faith doesn't look peaceful. She almost looks like she's scowling. Buffy would be so pissed if she knew I was coming here most afternoons. Oz knew, but now he's gone. I dunno if he ever told Willow - I doubt it, since Willow would freak bigtime if she knew. I don't even know why I'm still coming here. I have a feeling that when Faith wakes up she'll wake up fit enough to kick my ass there and then. There are times I wish I hadn't talked to her. Some of the stuff I told her was about me and boys at school. I've told her stuff...stuff that I've only written in here and I haven't told anyone else. Now that I'm convinced she's gonna wake up still bad, I'm scared she'll tell everyone my secrets.
I don't see Buffy so much at the moment, what with her living at UC Sunnydale and all. Most times I see her at Giles' place, like when she did the Thanksgiving meal there. I'm glad Mom let me stay here rather than go with her to Aunt Darlene's. Aunt Darlene still thinks I'm like 6 - I'm a teenager now for God's sake! Thanksgiving got all exciting here. Xander fell into this like ancient church and caught syphilis and malaria and smallpox, and this ancient Native American spirit was released that wanted to kill everyone. Xander was very brave about it, considering he could've died twice over and have his dick fall off. Oops, no, that would be leprosy. He was still brave though.
And Angel was here! I'm not sure quite what to make of the whole him hiding from Buffy thing, particularly since I goofed in the middle of the Thanksgiving meal and told her he'd been here. Then of course she had to go running off to LA after him. Don't know why she bothered, it's not like they can have sex or anything.
It was kinda freaky being stuck in Giles' apartment with spirits shooting arrows at us, but Spike was chained up in the middle of the room and kept getting hit by arrows (they all missed his heart, I guess the spirits didn't realise he was a Vampire) and though I know it musta hurt some it did look pretty funny. But I haven't had a chance to tell you about Spike before, have I? He's a Vampire, as you might have already guessed, only he got captured by some top secret commando type people and had experiments done on him. The whole "experimented on by government scientists" thing sounded a bit X-Files to me, but from what Spike's said there was no one as yummy as Mulder involved.
Spike is kinda yummy himself. Buffy fought him a couple years ago, but that was before the experiments were done on him. Yeah, the experiments. They put a chip in his head or something - it means he can't be violent. When he goes to hit someone he gets this massive migraine. Anyway, cuz he knows about the commando guys, Giles is keeping him at the apartment. The commandos got in Buffy's way when she was dealing with the whole Oz and Veruca situation, and Giles was worried they're gonna get in the way of Buffy's patrols and stuff. Since they talked to Spike it sounds like the commandos are bagging demons all over the place - doing Buffy's job, I guess. You'd think Buffy would like the idea of having some help, but she's kinda pissed about it.
Hmmm, I thought I was getting better at not getting sidetracked. Spike is a bleached blonde, which would normally be kinda icky...I mean, it's so eighties. At least, that's what Buffy keeps saying. She calls him a Billy Idol wannabe. I think she was just showing off that she knew who Billy Idol was - she only knows cuz she saw him in the Wedding Singer. Spike can be quite a handful for Giles so I keep going round there to try and help. He keeps saying I shouldn't be going there cuz Spike is still dangerous, but I'm not sure if he is or not. The way he gets so frustrated at not being able to fight is kinda cute.
Willow's still a bit freaked about Oz leaving. She did this mega-powerful spell that kinda made wishes of hers come true, just not in a very controlled way. All of a sudden Spike and Buffy were getting married. That was kinda sucky, with me finding him cute and all. I think I actually cried, although I was too busy being the Slayer at the time. Yeah, Willow made me the one with Slayer powers. She was a bit pissed at how Buffy was taking her Slayers duties seriously and was going after Spike (cuz he'd escaped), and while she was talking to Xander she made a comment about if Spike was so important why didn't Buffy just marry him. Then she said something about why did her best friend have to be the one who was the Slayer and couldn't Dawn be the Slayer for a change. All of a sudden I was out in the cemetery, finding myself fighting three Vampires. And I could kick butt. Boy could I kick butt.
Whenever Buffy tells stories about her slaying she likes the parts about how pissed Vampires are about getting their asses kicked by a girl. The Vampires I fought were certainly pissed at getting their asses kicked by a 13 year old girl. My tits don't even rate an A cup and I busted all three Vampires - how's that. It was nice to finally get to use the Dawnmeister stake for myself, I was starting to think I'd hafta wait for Buffy to end up in traction to get a chance to go on patrol with it.
Oh, and Xander became a "demon magnet". Willow was only commenting on his love life, but her wish spell thing took the phrase literally. Like, dah! So that got kinda hectic for him. Still, I helped him and Anya out some, and then we hooked up with Buffy. That shoulda been that, right? No. She was far too busy swapping spit with Spike to help fight off demons. Just as I was really getting the hang of the whole Slayer fighting thing, Willow turned up and undid the spell. Buffy was gonna tell Mom and have her ground me, but when I pointed out it was Willow's doing she kinda relented on that. I did hafta promise not to try going patrolling. Like I was gonna do that without Slayer powers. In the gym at school the next day I tried doing a fancy sweep kick on a crash mat and gave myself groin strain for a week. Groin strain and period cramps so do not mix. If I told Buffy about that maybe she'd cut me some slack, but I'd rather keep it to myself than talk to her about icky stuff like that.
It's kinda quiet at home without Buffy around. When she went to college she took all of the supernatural hokum with her. I mean, it's nice not to spend every other night shrieking in terror or running from something, but after three years of shrieking and running it's kinda dull. Even Mom misses it, you can tell. I'm not saying she's desperate for more of her colleagues to get turned into Grand Master Zombies (although the way she talks about some, I do wonder sometimes) but she's defintely finding things far too ordinary.
Spike is totally addicted to cable. I guess with him being kept tied up there's not a lot else for him to do, but every time I've turned up there the past three days he's been watching it. The "free porn" episode of Friends gave him ideas about hacking around with Giles' cable feed, until Giles pointed out I was a minor and that there was only a curtain separating Spike from bright sunlight. Giles is such a prude, like I've never seen porn before. Jilly found a tape in her brother's bedroom one time and we watched a bit. It was hilarious - all those funny faces! I didn't tell Giles this though because he'd only tell Buffy and she'd tell Mom. I didn't tell Spike either cuz he'd sell the information to Giles for extra blood rations. I told Faith when I was still talking to her, I doubt she'd even flinch at it though, everyone knows she spent half the time in that skanky motel room of hers watching free porn.
It would be nice if one day I turned up at Giles' after school and Spike wasn't watching Days of our Lives though. He gets all sappy while he's watching it - I've even seen him crying. Some of the actors are yummy, although Spike is crap at actor's names. He knows the names of all the actresses but none of the men, so whenever I ask him the name of one of the totally delicious actors on there he's like no use whatsoever - he just gives me a look like I'm a silly giggly teenager. He should meet Jilly, she's the one with all the N-Sync stuff. N-Sync records, N-Sync posters, N-Sync underwear. Well, I don't know about the last one but some of the guys at school reckon she's got some.
Jeez! I didn't realise the time. Mom will be wondering why I'm not home from Jilly's yet. Hospital visiting hours are way over too, I dunno why any of the nurses haven't come to throw me out. Gotta run. Will write more another time.
Dawn x