the bunny warren v. Faith

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All of Me

Author: Venus Blue
Written: April 19, 2005
Summary: Lindsey returns to the woman he loves, but she doesn't want him back.
Rating: G
Timeline: AU set before Hush in Season 4.
Disclaimer: Joss, Mutant, and Fox own all. I own nothing. Capice?
Distribution: Lists that archive. My site. Anyone who wants, ask.
Author's Notes: Written for Nora for the livejournal meme wherein people pick icons and I write drabble/fic based upon them. This fic is based on a manipulated icon featuring Lindsey and Tara with the caption "You still have all of me".

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"Why did you come here?"

Lindsey looked away from the angry blonde, his face contorting in pain as he surveyed her modest dorm room.

"I just...I wanted to see how you're doing. How college life is working for you."

"It's fine," Tara said, fighting to keep her voice calm and her stutter away. "I'm fine. And I don't believe that's why you're here."

He cleared his throat, rocking slightly on the heels of his boots before murmuring, "I miss you."

Tara swallowed roughly, turning from him and walking to her desk.

"You have no right to do this to me. You were the one who lied."

"I didn't-"

"Yes, you did. Don't try to deny it now."

He came up behind her, and Tara spun around.

"Don't."

He put his hand down, and she said, "It's been over a year, Lindsey. A year since I found out what you do for a living. What your law firm wanted to do to me."

"I didn't have any part of that!"

"It doesn't matter!" she cried, cursing herself for getting upset. In a quieter tone, she said, "It doesn't matter. You should have told me what your job was really about, and you didn't. And that's worse than lying."

Lindsey opened his mouth to protest, then closed it. Sitting down on the edge of her bed, he gripped the edges of the mattress and said, "So, what? I have to forget about you? Forget about how much you mean to me?"

Fighting back tears, Tara crossed her arms and looked down at him.

"I'm so tired, Lindsey. So tired of missing you, and loving you. I'm slowly starting to move on, to get on with my life, but I can't do that if you're still around. I wish you would just *leave*."

"You haven't seen me since-"

"That's not what I mean," she said, her voice quivering. "I wish you would leave my mind. No matter how long it's been, your still with me. I'm so alone, but I can't..."

"Please don't cry, Tara," he pleaded, seemingly fighting the urge to stand. "I can't stand to see you cry, I never could."

"Well, I don't have much choice in that," she laughed bitterly. "It's a woman thing."

He stood then, moving slowly to her. She turned from him, wrapping her arms tightly around herself, but he hugged her anyway, enveloping her in his arms. She fought a little, then gave in, not returning the hug, but resting her face in his shoulder, crying openly. Her whispered softly, "Do you remember the first time we met?"

She snorted derisively, and he said, "I'm serious. When you dropped your purse outside that coffee shop, and everyone just walked by?"

"Shoulder bag. Not a purse."

"When I helped you pick all of your things up, and you looked up and thanked me, I thought I was seeing an angel. I thought God had sent you to teach me a lesson for being such a bad person."

Tara muttered, "That's pretty extreme."

"The point is," he continued, pulling her hair away from her face and rocking her softly, "you made me want to be a better person. And I tried, so hard for you. But I only ended up hurting you more. And I will never forgive myself for that."

She pulled back, and he wiped the tears from her face.

"I shouldn't have come back."

"No, you shouldn't have."

"I won't anymore. I'll let you move on."

"Thank you."

She raised herself slightly, and softly kissed his cheek.

He moved for the door, and turned.

"No matter what, Tara? You'll always have the best of me."

She smiled sadly and said, "You'll always have all of me."

[End]


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BTVS in the Hands of an Insomniac

Author: Venus Blue
Written: June of 2001
Summary: I haven’t slept in 48 hours. I’m incredibly wired, and I want to write a fic. Craziness in Sunnydale as only a Bunny Goddess can do it. This makes no sense, I’m aware of that fact. Enjoy.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: General. Who knows what my mind will come up with?
Feedback: You know it. Please no flames, though I can handle a simple, "Wow…you’re insane." I’m used to that.
Disclaimer: Joss and company, who actually get sleep at night and therefore never have this much fun, own everything.
Awards: View, View 2nd Award

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"BUFFY!!!!!!!!!!"

Buffy was patrolling the cemeteries one night when she heard her name yelled really really loud. Looking up, she saw Willow skipping toward her with a big pink furby strapped to her shoulder.

"Hey, Buff. Watcha doin’?"

"Nothing. Just patrolling for the big scaries."

"Well, I guess that’s a good thing, ‘cause there’s one right behind ya."

Spinning around, Buffy saw a goldfish running up to her, teeth bared. Pulling out her honey baked ham, she stabbed it in the eye, and it turned to dust.

"Good job."

"Thanks."

"I guess we’re done here, huh?"

"Yep. Let’s find something else to do."

So they joined hands and began to skip again, singing tra la la as they made their way to The Bronze. When they got there, the doorman asked for covercharge, and they each handed him one turnip.

"Now, now. Do I look like I was born yesterday?"

Buffy turned to Willow and said, "Guess we can’t put anything past him."

Reluctantly, they handed over three pencils each.

"That’s what I thought."

Inside, the place was kicking. Couples were dancing madly on the dance floor, and a new band, The Singing Bullfrogs, were pounding away on their instruments on stage.

Willow and Buffy saw Xander and Anya sitting at a mushroom, and the quickly joined them.

"Hey, guys," Xander said. "Want a sip of my soda?"

"What kind?"

"Sneaker flavored."

"Nah. I’ll always prefer shampoo."

Xander nodded and said, "Oh, look, Angel’s here."

And guess what? Angel was there.

"Angel! Old Buddy!" Xander said, jumping up and hugging him. "How ya been?"

"I been great Xander. How about you?"

"Oh, man, I’m great! Haven’t seen you in awhile!"

"I know! I missed ya, buddy!"

Buffy rolled her eyes and said, "Oh, look! Spike’s here!"

Just then, whaddya know? Spike walked up!

"Hey everybody!"

"Spike!" Buffy said, walking over to him. "I missed you."

"Oh, lay off, Summers," Spike said, sitting next to Anya. "I’m tired of you fawning all over me all the time. I don’t like you."

"But, Spike! I love you!"

"You can’t love me. You’re a pez dispenser. Pez dispensers can’t love anyone!"

"Oh, but we can! I loved Angel!"

Looking over, Angel said, "Yeah, but I never loved you. I was only using you for your slightly bitter tasting candies."

"Doesn’t anyone love me?"

"I love you," Owen from "Never Kill a Boy on the First Date" said, coming out of the shadows. "You’re the coolest."

"Oh, wah," Buffy said, throwing her drink at Warren from "I was Made to Love You." "You only love me ‘cause I almost got you killed."

Willow patted Buffy on the arm and said, "There, there."

Just then Tara walked in and said, "Willow! I’m here to tell you we have to go do a spell, so that we can slip away and go have sex."

"Right! Let’s go do that spell!"

And with that, she left.

"Say, Angel, want to go shoot some pool?"

"Sure thing, buddy! Let’s go!"

And then they left.

Giles came in, cigarette in one hand, beer in the other, and said, "Buffy, you’re in my seat."

"Sorry, Ripper."

Standing up, Buffy moved away and sat on the box of cereal across from Drusilla, who had just appeared from thin air.

"Say, Anya? Have you seen Cordelia lately?"

"Last I heard, she’d run off to Paris with a chaos demon."

"Ooh, Chaos demons," Drusilla said as she painted her fingernails red with white tips. "They’re fun. All slime and antlers."

Suddenly, Olaf the Troll appeared, and proceeded to bash everyone in the Bronze over the head with his hammer. Buffy watched, a bored expression on her face.

"God, doesn’t anything interesting happen in this town?"

And somewhere, in a land far, far away, an insomniac bunny goddess giggled madly.

~The End


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Better with Age

Author: Venus Blue
Written: August 22, 2004
Summary: Buffy realizes her feelings for Riley are waning in favor of another.
Rating: NC-17, baby
Pairing: Buffy/Giles. Forgive me for the Buffy/Riley in the beginning.
Timeline: Sometime in the beginning of Season 5, around the time of The Real Me.
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon, 20th Century Fox, Mutant Enemy, blah blah blah copyright cakes.
Distribution: My site. Lists that archive. Possibly FF.net if I get really bored. Want it? Ask me. Haven't said no yet.
Author’s Note: Written for manic1066 for the allthejellies Smut Ficathon. She wanted a Joyce freak-out, a Riley punch-out, and no Spike. All three requests are very much something I can live with. Much love and thanks to Meltha for the beta, and for everything.

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“Buffy?”

“Yes, Giles?”

“I need to tell you something.”

“What is it?”

“I can’t breathe.”

“Oh.”

Taking her hand off his throat, she backed away as he leaned over to catch his breath.

“It’s been far too long since we’ve trained,” he said breathlessly. “I’m out of shape.”

“Nah. You’re just getting old.”

Glaring, he raised himself up to full height and motioned her forward. With a slight smirk, she came at him. Sidestepping her, he grabbed the back of her neck and pulled her arm back, flipping her to the ground. She landed with a grunt, and he stood over her.

“Old?”

“Well-aged,” she amended, leaping up and taking out his legs with a roundhouse sweep.

Landing on his back, he groaned loudly and winced, his face contorted in pain.

“Giles? Are you okay?”

“Yes,” he managed, sitting up gingerly. “Just…well-aged.”

Reaching out for his hand, she helped him to his feet.

“Need a break?” she asked, smiling sweetly.

“Maybe a short one.”

They sat down on the side bench of the training room, and Giles tossed her a bottle of water. Running a towel over the back of his neck, he asked, “Did you read the books I suggested to you last week?”

“I read one of them, the one about slayer training through the ages.”

“And what did you think?”

“Barbaric.”

“Some of them. Others do have some merit.”

“Okay, but if you come at me with bamboo shoots and a bowie knife, don’t expect me to take it lightly.”

Giles chuckled and took a long drink of his water.

“What does Riley think of all this training?”

Buffy sighed and stretched her back muscles.

“He’s throwing his temper tantrums. He says over and over that he understands and supports me, but then in the next breath he’s whining about not being able to spend time with me.”

“That’s to be expected. I’m sure it’s terribly frustrating.”

“You have no idea. I mean, I know where he’s coming from with this, but…” she trailed off and stood up.

“So how’s your love life, Giles?”

That brought out a full-belly laugh.

“Non-existent. But I think the nice lady at the book store down the street has been flirting with me.”

“The woman with the twitch?”

“No, the one with the mole.”

“Ah. She seems…nice.”

Giles smiled at her and said, “Shall we continue?”

“Yeah.”

As they sparred, Buffy couldn’t keep her concentration. Giles took her down twice on what should have been easy blocks, and she missed a perfect opportunity to take him down.

Lowering his padded hands, he looked at her quizzically.

“Guess I’m just tired.”

“We’ve only been training for a few hours.”

“I know, but I didn’t sleep well. I think I’ll just go patrol, and get some rest.”

Putting his hand on her shoulder, he frowned and asked, “You’re sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine. Sun goes down in two hours, so I guess I can give Riley some attention.”

“Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

“Right.”

She grabbed her bag and left the store.


**********************


“You really want to go here?” Riley asked incredulously.

“Just to have a look.”

Riley held the door open for her, and Buffy entered the bookstore. Sweeping her eyes around, she headed towards the shelves, Riley keeping up a constant flow of conversation behind her.

“So, I was thinking maybe we could see a movie tomorrow, before you go on patrol. They have that new Kate Hudson movie at the mall, and I know you were wanting to see it.”

Buffy grazed her eyes over the shelves in front of her, casually picking up one after another then returning it almost immediately, barely looking at it.

“So, what do you think?”

“About what?”

“Were you even listening to me?”

“When?”

“Buffy.”

“I’m sorry, Riley, I’m distracted. What did you say?”

“You, me, movies tomorrow?”

“Sure,” she mumbled, moving to the next aisle. Grabbing a book from the shelf, she headed back to the front.

“Uh, Buffy? Should I…know something?”

“What?”

He motioned to the book in her hand, and she looked down. She was holding a copy of _What to Expect When You’re Expecting_. Looking up at his ashen face, she smiled and quickly said, “It’s for a class.”

“Ah.”

Walking up to the register, Buffy took a good look at the woman behind the counter.

“Is this going to be all for you today?”

She nodded. The woman was attractive enough, if she got rid of that thing on her face. She had red hair, a pretty face, and a big smile.

“Ma’am?”

“What?”

“I said that’s going to be $9.34.”

“Oh!” Buffy pulled a $10 bill from her pocket and handed it to her. The woman gave her the change and wished her a good day. Buffy mumbled her thanks and quickly left the store.

“What was that all about?”

“What?”

“You’re acting very strange.”

“I’m just tired is all.”

“Want me to patrol for you?”

“Well…yes, actually. Yes, please.”

He hugged her tightly, kissing her. She smiled up at him and said, “See you later.”

He set off for the cemetery, and Buffy sighed deeply, heading in the opposite direction.


**********************


“Buffy? What are you doing here so late?”

“I was hoping to talk to you. Are you and Tara busy?”

“No, not at all,” Willow said, opening the door so she could enter. “We just finished eating and were gonna watch a movie.”

“Are you hungry?” Tara called, motioning to the white cartons of Chinese food on the table. “We have plenty left.”

“No, I’m good, thanks.”

“Sit down. Are you okay?”

“Define okay.”

Willow and Tara exchanged a look, and Tara asked, “Do you want me to…”

“No, please stay. I just need to talk to somebody.”

They sat in the living room, and Buffy said, “I think…I think I want to break up with Riley.”

Willow’s eyes widened, and she said, “Are…are you sure?”

“I don’t know! It’s just…there’s someone else. And I can’t even stand talking to Riley anymore, and it’s not fair to him.”

“W-wait, you’re seeing someone else?” Willow asked in a shocked voice.

“Well, no. I…it’s…”

Willow frowned, and said, “This doesn’t sound like you.”

“I know, it’s just…just recently this guy drew my attention, and now…I mean, I’ve known him for awhile now, but just recently I can’t get him out of my mind.”

“Is it Xander?” Willow asked, sitting up slightly.

“What? No! Willow! Xander is my friend, I don’t think of him like that. And hello, Anya?”

“Well, I just figured…”

“It’s Giles,” Tara said quietly.

Buffy’s head whipped around, and she asked, “How did you know?”

She smiled that quiet smile, and said, “It was only a matter of time before the two of you admitted your feelings.”

“Was I that obv-the two of us?”

Tara just smiled. Willow was still looking shell-shocked, and Buffy was frozen.

“Tara,” she said slowly, “are you sure?”

“Well, was I wrong about you?”

Buffy couldn’t do anything but stare.


**********************


“Buffy! What are you doing here so early?”

Setting her bag down, Buffy shrugged and said, “Mom and Dawn went shopping. I just figured…it’s not a problem, is it?”

“No, not at all. I was just about to have some tea. Would you care to join me?”

“Sure.”

They sat at the small table, and Giles handed her a mug. Clasping it tightly in her hands, Buffy stared at the rising steam, trying to find her voice.

“Giles, can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“What do you think of Riley?”

Giles seemed taken aback for a moment.

“Well…I think he’s a very nice gentleman. He seems to care about you, and treats you well.”

Buffy said nothing, and Giles inquired, “He does treat you well, yes?”

“Oh. Yeah, I guess.”

“Buffy, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she said quickly, taking a drink of the tea and yelping as she burned her tongue. He handed her a water bottle, and she drank it rapidly.

“Let’s train,” she said breathlessly. Giles stared at her dumbstruck.

As they sparred, Buffy thought about what Tara had said. It seemed impossible. Giles had never treated her as anything more than a daughter, or his Slayer. There was no way…

So wrapped in her thoughts was she that she misjudged a hit and sent him flying across the room. Hurrying over to him, she crouched down, her hand on his chest.

“Oh, god, Giles, I’m so sorry! Are you okay?”

Groaning, he sat up, wincing as he felt his torso.

“I don’t think anything’s broken. You just bruised me some.”

He smiled reassuringly at her, and she frowned. Leaning forward slowly, she kissed him softly. His lips were unyielding at first, and she began to pull back from embarrassment, when his arms encircled her, pulling her tightly against him as he deepened the kiss. Wrapping her fingers in his short hair, she lost herself in the kiss, enjoying the feeling of Giles’ strong hands on her hips.

When they finally pulled away to breathe, Giles stared at her in obvious shock.

“Buffy, I didn’t know.”

“Neither did I,” she murmured. “Until a few days ago.”

“So…that’s what the distraction’s been about? The worries over Riley?”

“I don’t want to hurt him, but I can’t stop thinking about you, Giles.”

“Oh, god,” he muttered, pulling her back to him for another kiss. She moaned longingly into his mouth, her nails running up and down his back.

“I’ve loved you for so long,” he said, resting his forehead against hers. “I never thought you’d feel the same.”

They sat there, limbs entangled, kissing, talking, for a long time. Finally, Giles took her face in his hands and said, “I have to tell you, as much as I love you, and I do…I won’t be the other man.”

“I would never do that to you. Never. I want you, and only you.”

They finally stood, Buffy helping him up, and he pulled her to him tightly, kissing the top of her head.

“My mom’s gonna freak.”

“Do you want me there when you tell her?”

“I’m a little worried she might kill you.”

“I think I’ll take my chances.”

Smiling up at him, she said, “This is unreal. I can’t believe this is actually happening.”

“You? I keep waiting to wake up alone like usual.”

Rising up on her tiptoes, she gently bit the side of his neck.

“That hurt?”

“A little.”

“Obviously, you’re not dreaming.”

Laughing, he pulled her in for yet another kiss.


**********************


“Buffy? I thought we were going to a movie.”

“Um, yeah, change of plans. Come on in.”

Riley entered the house slowly, looking around.

“Where’s your mom?”

“She and Dawn went shopping. Have a seat.”

He did so cautiously, watching her intently.

“Is something wrong?”

Sitting next to him, she leaned forward, dreading what she had to say.

“Riley, I care about you a lot, I do. But-”

“No. No, no, no, don’t say that.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Are you…are you breaking up with me?”

“I think it’s for the best.”

Riley stared at her, his shock evident.

“Is there someone else?”

Buffy frowned, and he nodded.

“That’s what I thought.”

He stood up, and paced the floor in front of her.

“Do I know him?”

“Riley-”

“It’s Xander, isn’t it?”

“What? No, it’s not Xander! He’s with Anya, remember?”

“Yeah, well, I thought you were with me, but I was wrong about that, too.”

“It’s not Xander. Look-”

“It’s that guy in your poetry class. The one whose poems you took home. I knew something was going on there!”

“Riley!” she exclaimed. “It’s not him, either. It doesn’t matter who it is. I don’t want to be with you.”

“How long have you been with this other guy?”

“I’m not really with anyone.”

“Fine, how long have you known you wanted to break up with me?”

“Not very long.”

“Then you could change your mind!”

“I’m not going to. I’m sorry, Riley.”

Looking heartbroken, he said, “Fine. I’ll go.”

Buffy stood then, but he held up his hand to stop any movement on her part, and headed out the front door.


**********************


“Buffy, we’re home! Oh, Rupert, I didn’t know you were going to be here.”

“Hello, Joyce,” he said, a nervous smile on his face. Buffy entered the living room from the kitchen, and said, “Hey, Mom. We need to talk.”

Joyce raised an eyebrow and said, “What’s going on?”

“Sit down. Please?”

Dawn came in then, and asked, “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Buffy said quickly. “Dawn, please do me a huge favor, and go upstairs.”

The younger Summers girl groaned.

“I’m tired of being left out all the time!”

“Dawn, please?” Buffy pleaded.

“Dawn, honey, please go upstairs. Just for a little while.”

“Fine. But you guys owe me.”

She stomped her way upstairs, and Buffy waited until the door slammed to continue.

“I think you need to know, Mom. Riley and I broke up.”

“What? Oh, honey, I’m so sorry.”

“No, Mom, it’s fine. I broke up with him.”

“Oh. Well, are you okay about it?”

“It was long past due. Really.”

Joyce hugged her, and Buffy looked at Giles over her mother’s shoulder. He looked like a man ready to be blindfolded before being led out to the execution squad. She smiled at him reassuringly.

“There’s something else, Mom.”

Pulling back from her, she looked at her for a moment.

“Oh dear. What is it? You’re not pregnant, are you?”

Buffy laughed aloud.

“Oh, god, no.”

Giles quietly moved into the kitchen to wait, and Buffy took a deep breath.

“There’s someone else, someone that I love very much.”

“So soon? That doesn’t seem like you, Buffy.”

“Well, it’s not really soon, Mom. I’ve known him for awhile, and things just sort of happened.”

“Is it Xander?”

“NO! Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

“Well, he just seemed the natural choice.”

“No, Mom, it’s not Xander. It’s…Giles.”

Joyce stared, and from the second floor, Dawn screeched, “GILES?!”

“DAWN!”

The bedroom door slammed shut again.

“Mom?” Buffy asked nervously.

“Is this a joke?”

“No. I love him.”

“Buffy, he’s far too old for you.”

“I’m almost 20 years old, Mom. I’m not a child. And I love him,” she repeated firmly. “And Angel was far older than he is.”

“And I didn’t approve of him, either!” she exclaimed, her voice rising dramatically.

“Mom, please don’t do this. Please don’t freak.”

“Well, how do you expect me to react?” she asked, her voice near hysteria now. “You tell me this, and I’m supposed to be fine with it just like that?”

“I don’t expect you to be fine with it. But I need you to accept it.”

“He is old enough to be your father! Is this some sort of psychological complex?”

“Mom!”

“Do you realize he is going to die far before you will? And what about children?”

“Joyce,” Giles said quietly, re-entering the living room, “I realize you’re upset-”

“Upset? Upset?! Rupert, how could you? I trusted you with her!”

“And neither she nor I meant for this to happen,” he said as gently as he could manage. “But it did. And if you want any sort of relationship with your daughter, you will need to accept that fact.”

Joyce stood abruptly, and Buffy jumped up.

“Mom, please. I’m an adult. Let me make my own choices,” she pleaded.

Joyce frowned at her oldest child, but before she could say anything, there was a knock at the door. Walking to it briskly, she opened it to see Riley standing on the other side.

“Hi, Mrs. Summers. Is Buffy here?”

Joyce turned back to Buffy, who exchanged a look with Giles before saying, “What is it, Riley?”

“We need to talk,” he said, moving to her. “I can’t just let you go without trying. Whoever this other guy is, I know he can’t make you as happy or love you as much as I do.”

“He doesn’t know?” Joyce asked.

“Know what?”

Joyce looked from Riley to Buffy, and then to Giles. Riley followed her eyes, and realization hit him.

“You’re kidding me.”

“Riley-” Buffy started.

“No. No way! You are not leaving me for him!”

“I’m sorry, Riley.”

He was turning red with anger.

“You’re leaving me for him. Him! He’s old enough to have grandkids! That’s disgusting!”

“I beg your pardon!” Giles stormed, his own temper rising.

“Giles, it’s okay. Riley, you need to leave now.”

“Well, don’t come running to me when you’re changing both your children’s and your husband’s diapers.”

Rearing back, Buffy punched him, sending him flying across the living room and into the far wall.

“Get. Out,” she ordered stonily, her body shaking with rage. “You have no right to say anything about Giles, you small-brained whiney little crybaby. Get out of my house NOW.”

Picking himself up painfully, Riley limped to the door. He turned as though to say something else, but apparently thought better of it, and simply left.

Giles walked to Buffy and put his arms around her. He whispered, “Are you alright?”

“I’ll be fine. That felt really good.”

He laughed softly and kissed her forehead. Joyce cleared her throat, and he reluctantly pulled away.

“Look,” she said slowly. “I don’t approve of this, but I guess it’s really not my choice. You’ve obviously made up your mind, and I…just have to accept that.”

“Are you sure you’re okay, Mom?”

“I will be.”

Buffy hugged her tightly, wanting to cry with relief.


**********************


They entered Giles’ apartment, and he flipped the lights on.

“Do you want some tea?”

“No,” she sighed, pulling his head down for a kiss. He pulled her into his arms, lifting her off her feet as he deepened the kiss.

“I want you,” she whispered huskily.

“I want you, too.”

He lifted her into his arms and they moved up the stairs quickly. Setting her on the bed, he leaned over her, his hand in her hair and his mouth on her neck.

Sighing contentedly, Buffy pulled him back onto the bed, laying next to him and running her hands over his back.

“You sure you want to be with someone as old as I am?” he asked with a smile in his eyes.

“I think you’re just the right age,” she said, mirroring his smile as she removed his glasses. “But just in case there’s any doubt, maybe you should prove how young you really are.”

Giles chuckled and kissed her again, his hand cupping her breast and his thumb running circles around her nipple. Gasping into his mouth, Buffy gripped his arms, her leg moving between his to rub against his crotch.

Moving his mouth lower, he nipped gently at her earlobe before sliding his tongue down her neck. Pulling off her blouse, he ran his tongue over her exposed cleavage, his thumb still gently manipulating one nipple. Buffy reached around to unclasp her bra, but he gently smacked her hand away. Through the thin lacy fabric he bit down on her hardened nipple, eliciting a deep moan of delight from her. She squirmed, frustrated, and he grinned up at her as he moved to the other breast.

Pulling his head up until they were face to face, she captured his earlobe between her teeth, gently suckling on it. She was rewarded with a moan that vibrated in his chest and sent shivers down her spine.

“Make love to me, Giles. Please, dear god, I need you inside of me.”

Feeling a thrill of lust shoot straight to his groin, he slid his hand down her body, slipping two fingers inside her. She bit her lip, fighting to keep from screaming out loud in pleasure.

Curling his fingers to gently stroke her, he applied light pressure to her clit with his thumb, rotating it while continuously pistoning his fingers into her.

Bending her knees, Buffy raised her hips, thrusting uncontrollably at his hand, her head thrown back and her mouth hanging open in unabashed pleasure.

Leaning over, Giles licked and suckled at her neck, propping himself up on his elbow and returning his mouth to her breast. Worrying her nipple lightly with his teeth, he raised his eyes to her face, and watched as she contorted with ecstasy.

Sensing that she was close, he moved down her body and buried his tongue inside her. Screaming his name, she jerked, driving herself into him, panting with desire and need.

Wrapping his lips around her clit, he sucked furiously, laving it with his tongue. Arching her back, Buffy came, crying out his name as she collapsed back onto the bed, her body shaking with release.

Kissing his way back up her stomach, Giles leaned on his elbows over her, studying her relaxed, kiss-swollen face and messy hair.

“You are so beautiful,” he murmured, sweeping her damp hair away from her face and kissing her forehead lightly.

Putting her arms around his neck, she pulled his head down, kissing him softly but intently.

“Thanks for that,” she whispered, smiling up at him impishly.

Reaching down, she wrapped one hand around his erection, squeezing gently, and Giles hissed, his eyes squeezed tightly shut. Wrapping her legs around his hips, she raised her lower body up to lightly rub her tender clit against his straining cock. Giles closed his eyes, fighting to think about something, anything, to slow himself down.

“Now, Giles, please. Fuck me now, please,” she begged, leaning up to kiss any inch of flesh she could reach.

“Oh god,” he murmured, reaching down to position himself at her entrance. Slowly sliding into her, he buried his face in her neck, fighting to keep from completely losing it as her tight walls gripped him firmly. Buffy whimpered softly, and he slid completely in, feeling her spasm around him as she adjusted.

“Please,” she moaned again and again. Giles laughed softly.

“I don’t want this to be over before it starts,” he said quietly, with a hint of panic in his voice.

Meeting his eyes, she said softly, “You won’t disappoint me. I know you won’t. You couldn’t.”

He slowly began to thrust, and Buffy gripped his shoulders, rotating her hips in time with his. She could see that he was straining to keep his stamina up, and she raised herself up, kissing his chest and digging her fingernails into his scalp. Tightening her thighs around his ribs, she pulled his head down next to hers.

“I love you,” she whispered.

Unable to fight it, he came, gasping her name as he thrust mindlessly into her, his hands gripping the bed sheets until his knuckles were white.

Buffy scratched her nails along his back, kissing his cheek gently until he rolled over and lay beside her, not looking at her. Stroking his face, she smiled contentedly at him, enjoying the exhausted expression on his face.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

“For what? That was wonderful.”

“I didn’t last very long.”

“You’re out of practice,” she said, grinning. “You’ll improve with time.”

He laughed softly, and she wrapped her arm around his waist, resting her head on his chest. Stroking the small of her back, he said, “Well, if you hadn’t dropped that on me so suddenly, I might have managed a modicum of control.”

Looking up at him with mock hurt, she said, “Would you rather me not say that?”

“Not when I’m fighting to maintain my claim that I’m still a young, virile man.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t have any complaints tonight. And you have plenty of time to prove it to yourself. Again, and again, and again,” she said, grinning mischievously.

Reaching to the side of the bed, Giles pulled a sheet off the chair and covered them both with it. Sighing contentedly, Buffy curled up against him, closing her eyes and listening to Giles’ heartbeat as she drifted to sleep.


**********************


When Buffy awoke, she was confused as to where she was. Frowning, she sat up, quickly realizing that not only was she naked, she was lying next to an equally naked Giles.

Smiling, she rolled onto her side, resting on one elbow as she watched him sleep. The lines on his face were much less pronounced when he was resting, and Buffy tenderly traced one before pulling back for fearing of waking him.

Looking down, she spotted his sheet-covered erection, and she was surprised for a moment. She recovered quickly, smirking wickedly to herself and sliding under the covers and down the bed.

Giles awoke at the first swipe of her tongue, and he moaned, his eyes popping open to see the figure moving underneath the sheet, causing him so much pleasure.

Buffy started slowly, moving her mouth up and down, swirling her tongue around as she moved her hand slowly up and down the base of his penis.

Giles pulled the sheet off of them, moving his fingers into her hair and massaging her scalp as he let his head fall back in bliss.

Pulling away, she continued to pump him with her hand as she moved up his body, kissing him soundly.

“Good morning.”

“Morning,” he managed, grabbing her hips and pulling her to him, sitting up to kiss her more firmly. Sliding into his lap, Buffy gripped the back of his head, her knees squeezing him as she straddled his pelvis. Pushing him back down, she rested her hands on his chest, lifting herself and sinking back down onto his cock, sighing in pleasure as she felt him fill her.

Riding him slowly, she watched his face as it contorted in pleasure, his fingers digging into her hips hard enough to leave bruises. Leaning back to rest her hands on his knees, she moved leisurely, enjoying the sensations and the view.

Giles looked up at her, his face twisted in a smile, and he grabbed her waist, yanking her back into a sitting position and pulling her down, slamming his hips up and watching her eyelids flutter as he hit her g spot. Buffy looked at him in wild-eyed wonder, and he pulled her down again, continuing his thrusts as Buffy screamed and moaned with lust.

Fighting to regain her control over the situation, Buffy grabbed Giles hands, raising them up and leaning on them for support. As she expected, Giles tightened his elbows, and she moved into a crouch over him, her knees drawn close together above his torso. This tightened her internal walls, and Giles gasped, biting his lip and squeezing her hands ruthlessly. As she bounced rapidly, the air filled with both of their cries.

Sitting up, Giles grabbed her and flung her down onto the bed, covering her with his body and burying himself in her once more, grabbing her by the shoulders and holding her tightly against him as he pounded into her, his eyes locked on hers as they moved apart and together again and again.

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing her fiercely. She gripped his head with both hands, pulling his hair as she sucked his tongue in her mouth.

“I love you, too,” she panted, gasping as he pulled all the way out before slamming back inside of her. “Oh, god, Giles…oh, god…”

Moving his hands down her body, he lifted her hips at an angle so that his pelvic bone rubbed against her clit. Whimpering unabashed, Buffy drove herself against him, seeking release. Holding her tightly, he slowed his movements, drawing each thrust out as long as possible. Buffy fought him, albeit half-heartedly, pulling him towards her to speed up his movement.

Stopping all together, he looked at her and asked, “Old?”

Smiling wickedly, she said, “Better with age.”

Pulling her up and onto his lap, he guided himself into her and raised her by her hips before letting her fall back down. Picking up the rhythm, she ground herself against him, rubbing her clit against his pubic bone and using his shoulders for leverage. Leaning forward, Giles grabbed one of her breasts in his mouth and sucked and bit viciously, causing her to scream with pleasure as she came, shuddering and shaking around him. She froze, her back arched, and Giles thrust rapidly, relishing the sensation as she clenched and spasmed around him, bringing on a spine-tingling orgasm that caused him to fall back, panting for breath. Buffy collapsed on top of him, fighting to catch her breath.

Sighing contentedly, Giles kissed the top of her head, stroking her back and taking a long shuddery breath.

“Are you alright?” he asked.

“Better than.”

“Good.”

They lay silently, listening to each other’s breathing, and Buffy said, “Oh, and Giles?”

“Yeah?”

“Next time you start feeling old?”

“Mm-hmm?”

“Let’s sleep on it.”

[end]


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Bunnies Aren't Just Cute Like Everybody Supposes

Author: Venus Blue
Written: November of 2001
Summary: Anya comes to terms with her fears.
Rating: R for drug usage
Spoilers: Erm…the only spoiler I can see is the title.
Feedback: Yes please.
Disclaimer: I own nothing except the strangest collection of stuffed animals ever. Joss and company own Anya, her fears, and her quirks.
Warning: Drug Usage. Also…I’m not really sure how to describe the Anya/Bunnies scene except to say…kinda vicious. I’ve never written anything like this before, and I must say…I enjoyed it. Heh.
Distribution: I have no problems with distribution as long as I'm asked first.
AN: This is in response to Crazyevildru’s challenge. I’m the Green Bunny Goddess, how can I turn that one down?
Awards: , View 2nd Award, View 3rd award

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Anya was frozen. She couldn’t move, couldn’t speak, couldn’t cry out for help.

She stared at the horrible monstrosity in front of her, her lip quivering, tears coming to her eyes.

"X-X-Xander…Xander, where are you?!" she screamed finally. The creature looked at her quizzically.

Xander came through the clearing then, and asked, "What is it?"

"Th-th-there. Over there!"

Xander followed her gaze, and sighed.

"Anya…it’s a wild rabbit. It’s not going to hurt you."

"Make it go away! Please!"

Setting down the picnic basket containing their lunch, Xander quietly walked over to where the small brown bunny was resting. It looked up at him, obviously not caring much that he was there, then nonchalantly hopped away.

Sitting down next to his beloved, he pulled her hands from the blanket, where they were tightly clenched.

"Ahn…honey, it’s gone."

"B-but there could be more. There could be more out here! We have to go!"

"I’m here now. I won’t let any rabbits get near you."

Falling back into Xander’s arms, he could feel her small body shaking. She curled up in his lap, and said, "I guess this picnic wasn’t such a good idea after all."

Sighing, he lightly stroked her hair and said, "Honey, can I ask you a question?"

"Hmm?"

"Why are you so terrified of bunnies? I mean, you were a vengeance demon. Let’s face it, bunnies aren’t big with the striking fear into hearts. Especially not the heart of someone who can eviscerate someone with the blink of an eye."

Sighing, Anya looked up at Xander and said, "I don’t really like to talk about it."

"Well, if I’m going to be your husband, don’t you think I should know?"

She wanted to say no. She was desperate to refuse. But she realized she needed to tell him. He’d told her about his fear of clowns and polyester, and she hadn’t even touched on her fear. It was just so painful…

"Alright. I guess you need to know…"

…………………

NEW YORK-1969

"Where IS this girl?!" Anyanka wondered. She’d been wandering around this damned music festival for the last hour, trying to find the scorned woman whose pain had called out to her. Normally, she could find someone in an instant. But there were so many people…and so much noise.

Glancing up at the stage, she watched as the performers on stage crooned out another mindless song.

Shaking her head, she turned to look ahead of her and ran into a group of young people.

"Hey, man, watch out," one of them said, in a very spacey manner.

"Get out of my way," she hissed, not wanting to waste her time with unnecessary mortals. The show was nearly over, and she wanted to find the girl quickly.

"Aw, man, cool out. It’s alright. Have a seat. Hendrix will be on in a few. You don’t want to miss his big finish."

"I’m not interested in the concert! I’m trying to find someone!"

"But it’s Jimi, man. Jimi’s God."

"Uh-huh," Anyanka said, trying to zone them out and concentrate on the woman’s energies.

"Come on, chica. Here, want something to level you?"

He held a joint out to her, and she sighed. She wasn’t finding the girl anytime soon. And she’d already exacted revenge on one male that day. She didn’t see a problem in taking a little break.

Taking the marijuana cigarette from the young male, she took a quick hit, fighting to keep from coughing as the harsh smoke entered her lungs.

"There you go. Come on, sit down."

Sitting down on the blanket, Anyanka curled her bell bottom-clad legs underneath her and rested her arms behind her.

The young woman on the other side her, who looked like she could use a good bath, held out a small sugar cube to her.

"Expand your mind, man."

"Uh…okay."

She examined the cube for half a second. she wasn’t sure exactly why she was being offered a clump of sugar, but when in Rome…

Placing the sweet lump onto her tongue, she crunched it up, and swallowed it quickly.

They watched her curiously, then turned to continue watching the show.

As her body relaxed from the affects of the joint, she lay back on the blanket, letting the music pour into her ears.

When the set ended, she heard people clapping, and she opened her eyes.

Above her, leering over her with a sinister grin and huge beady red eyes, was the largest and most vile looking creature she’d ever seen. It had long pointy ears, greenish fur, and huge sharp teeth.

Screaming, she jumped from the blanket. The others turned to look up at her, and one of the males said, "Uh-oh. She’s having a bad trip."

The demonic rabbit leered at her, and said, "What’s up…doc?"

Now thoroughly terrified, she ran, tripping over patrons as they lounged on their blankets.

"What’s your problem, chick?" a girl asked, dodging her as she tried to run straight through her.

She slapped the young woman, then turned back to see where the bunny was. It was RIGHT BEHIND HER!

Thoroughly freaked now, she spun around, getting very very confused and feeling nauseous.

She closed her eyes, wishing with all her might that the rabbit would be gone when she opened them again.

Cautiously, she cracked her eyelids open, and saw not one, but FOUR RABBITS! All with the same leery grin, except different colors now.

The pink one stroked her ears menacingly and said, "I’m hungry."

Frozen to the spot, Anyanka could only cower in fear.

The large, muscular blue one said, "You’re always hungry. You got the last one. This one’s mine!"

The lean yellow bunny slapped him out of the way and said, "No, way. Go eat a carrot."

They argued for awhile, then the original green one slapped them all away.

"I saw her FIRST!" and with that final word, the demon rabbit lunged for her. Anyanka fell to the ground, clawing at the bunny with her fingers. Nothing seemed to work. She could feel the rabbit’s razor-sharp incisors digging into her flesh, trying to devour her. She screamed as she felt the other rabbits tearing at her legs and arms, and finally she fell limp, blacking out.

…………………

"When I finally woke up, I was in some sort of tent with all these other hippies. I couldn’t understand WHY there were no bite marks, and no one would believe me that these huge bunnies had attacked me!"

Xander had been silent through the entire story, just letting her talk. Finally, he looked into Anya’s eyes and let the peals of laughter escape his throat.

"It’s not FUNNY! I could’ve been really hurt!"

Still laughing, he lay back on the blanket, holding his aching stomach as the tears of laughter rolled down his cheeks.

With a loud huff, Anya stood up and walked away from the blanket.

"You’re so mean, Xander!"

Still laughing, Xander reached into the basket and pulled out a sandwich.

God, he loved that woman.

No matter how insane she was.

~ The End

**Terms of the Challenge:

Things to Include:
-complete explanation for why Anya hates bunnies
-one of the gang finding out and reacting to it (can be now or past, like if she knew spike before???)
-a bunny
-bonus points for a period piece (flashback?)

Optional:
-SMUT makes me happy!
-Smut
-and did I mention smut?
–Xander **


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Dust Bunnies

Author: Venus Blue
Written: August of 2003
Rating: G
Pairing: None
Summary: He knows she hates coming home to a dirty house.
Spoilers: The entirety of Angel, in general.
Feedback: Valued more than sex and chocolate.
Distribution: At my site, The Bunny Warren. Probably FF.net, if I get really bored. Any lists who archive. Anyone who wants, please ask. I haven't said no yet.
Disclaimer: Joss, ME, and 20th Century Fox owns all. I claim only the plot bunny.
Dedication: To Q, at the Ire_Uk Mailing List. He sort of planted this in my head, and I'm finally getting around to writing it.
Author's Note: There was one character in Angel who got the short end of the stick. When the big stuff went down, he was kept in the dark, and I can't help wondering what he's doing right now.
Awards: View, View 2nd award, View 3rd award, View 4th award, View 5th award, View 6th award

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Dust. Dust everywhere. No matter how often he runs the vaccuum and swipes the feather duster, more seems to accumulate.

He's been here a long time. Feels like forever. So many girls, so many deaths. But then she came. And he made a friend.

Her life wasn't easy. He was non corporeal, not non feeling. He tried to make it better. He kept the house clean, he kept the lighting the way she liked it. He was always ready with an aspirin and a cold glass of water or a hot mug of tea. He even scrubbed her back when she was in the worst pain.

Her friends stopped coming by. At first they were always here. He didn't like the tall one all that much. In the beginning, he was okay. He would talk to him, and brood a bit. He certainly did like to hear the sound of his own voice. But then he'd been floating along, minding his own business, and the tall's ones spikey hair had gone through him. He really didn't like that sensation. Then his girl had started to have feelings for him, and he didn't like that at ALL.

The bald one was okay. Always said hello when he came through the door. Times had changed a lot since his days, and he wasn't used to seeing a black man sitting so amicably among whites. It was a good change. He'd always thought those laws were a load of crap.

His girl had told him about her tryst with the British one, so he was immediately wary of him. Then when that violent woman had broken into the apartment, and he couldn't get rid of her, he was happy to have the British one there. He'd tried to protect them. Since then, there'd been a new level of respect. Chairs pulled out for him, books handed over. He especially enjoyed giving him books, because it tended to scare the daylights out of him.

He was helpful. He never said he wasn't mischevious.

He had liked the quiet girl at first. Sitting under the table, eating her peanut butter. She was so scared, so alone. He wanted to comfort her. But his girl had said no, she had to go.

When she came back the last time, she yelled at him. He'd helped them. Helped them find her medicines, wanted to make sure his girl was safe. And what did he get in return? Her loud shouts, and her anger. He hadn't done anything wrong! They were trying to take her things! She would need her things when she came back!

She would be back. He knew that. She wouldn't leave him. She loved her home, and she loved him. Maybe not the same way Kerri, his fiance, had. He missed her sometimes. Kerri reminded him a lot of his new girl. But she was gone. And he had her. And he didn't need anyone else.

That woman has been back. The woman who helped his girl get the apartment. She's brought new people in. He's done his best to keep them out, and it's making the woman angry.

Why does she keep bringing people in here? Doesn't she know his girl doesn't want strange people in her house? It's very rude, in his opinion. You can't just barge into someone's place and try to give it away!

She'll need to buy a new calendar. The one on the wall ran out months ago. Maybe this time she'll get the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit one he's been pushing for.

He knows she'll be back.

And until she comes back, he'll keep dusting.

---The End---


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End of the World

Author: Venus Blue
Written: April of 2004
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Buffy/Angel
Warning: Angst, pain, loss, the staples for these things.
Summary: Written for Miggy for the LJ Angst Ficathon. She wanted future, infertile Buffy. Hope this is satisfactory, dear.
Distribution: My site, The Bunny Warren, List archives, and possibly FF.net, if I get really bored. If you'd like it, please just ask, I've never said no yet.
Feedback: Is a truly beautiful thing.
Note: Many thanks to Meltha for her help with the plot bunny, and the quickie beta.
Awards: View Award, View 2nd award, View 3rd award, View 4th award, View 5th award

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Angel had always been certain that the greatest moment in his long life was the day he married Buffy. Seeing her glowing smile as she walked toward him in her billowing white gown, he couldn’t imagine anything feeling as wonderful.

He was very wrong.

For when the day came that she welcomed him home with open arms and a little plastic strip with a single blue line on it, Angel was more grateful than ever for his Shanshu. It was by far the definition of pure happiness.


*****


Buffy agonized over every little detail in the nursery. Angel wanted to paint the walls a neutral yellow, but Buffy protested it would be ugly. Eventually he learned to defer to maternal instinct, and watched as she and Dawn painted pastel blue walls with large white fluffy clouds. Dawn was nearly as excited as Buffy, wanting her own daughter to finally have a cousin and playmate.

When Buffy moaned about her increasing pant size, Angel would laugh, kissing the small bulge and calling it his “little Buddha.” Though she pretended to be offended, she couldn’t help but laugh.

When she was four months along, the cravings started, almost always in the middle of the night. Angel was still head of Wolfram and Hart, and he was working double time to clean it up. He didn’t want to have to explain to his son or daughter just what he did for a living. While he hated being away from his wife, he often ended up working long hours, leaving Buffy to fend for herself at home. Often times, Dawn would stay over, teaching Buffy how to knit or do latch work. Willow had promised to fly in from England before the baby was born, though she and Giles were impossibly busy with their own herd.

It was nearly midnight one night when Buffy started craving Ben & Jerry’s. Normally their freezer was well stocked, but she had put off grocery shopping until the last minute as always. There was a convenience store a few blocks from their house, and Buffy didn’t want to call Dawn and wake her for something so petty.

It happened so fast, later memories were nothing but a blur. A vampire, wanting to make a name for himself by taking out the oldest living slayer. During the pregnancy, she hadn’t been keeping up with her usual workouts, and her reflexes faltered. She managed to stake him, but not before he’d gotten one good kick to her stomach.

Blinding pain. Screaming until her throat was on fire. Blood soaking into her pants and running down her legs.

She remembered calling 911 on her cell phone and telling them where she was. Then nothing.


*****


When she opened her eyes again, she was met with harsh white. Turning her head, she realized she was in a hospital bed, Angel in the chair beside her, his head lolled to one side in sleep, his hand resting on her calf.

“Angel?”

His eyes snapped open immediately, and he sat forward, scooting his chair forward and taking one of her hands into his own larger ones.

“What…what happened?”

“Do you remember anything?” he asked, his voice soft.

“The vamp,” she breathed. “He attacked me. He kicked…my baby. Is the baby okay?”

Watching Angel fight back the tears was the only answer she needed. Burying her face in her hands, she let out a scream, sobbing as Angel pulled her tightly to him.


*****


After the breakdown, all Buffy wanted was to be left alone. She knew Dawn and Xander were in the waiting room, and probably others. She didn’t want sympathy and hugs, not even from her husband. Angel refused to leave her, even when she yelled for him to get out. He just sat quietly, letting her say all worlds of hurtful things. Eventually she would fall into silence again.

The doctor came to see her, but she wasn’t ready for jargon and medicines. Angel asked that she be given more time, and the doctor complied.

“I killed our baby.”

Angel turned sharply from the window. Buffy was still in the same position, her head turned away from him.

“What?”

“I did it. I’m the reason our baby is dead.”

“Buffy, no. That is far from the truth.”

Turning to look at him finally, her eyes were full of more pain than he’d ever seen.

“I made the choice to go walking at night. I could’ve called Dawn. I lost our baby because I wanted ice cream.”

Turning her head to face the wall once more, she clenched the bed sheets tightly in her fists, seemingly wanting to rip them to shreds. Taking one of her hands and bringing it to his lips, he kissed it, massaging the palm, then each finger in turn.

“I know this hurts. More than I can even understand. But it is not your fault. I know, and you know, how much we wanted this child. You would never do this on purpose.”

“Might as well have.”

“Hey. HEY. Look at me.” He tilted her head with his hand, and pressed his forehead to hers.

“Women have miscarriages every day. And babies are born every day. We’ll just have to keep working.”

She nodded, but the sadness in her eyes didn’t lessen.

“Hey. If anyone was going to blame you, it would be me, right?” At her nod, he continued, “Well, I’m not. I don’t think you went looking for a fight. Do you believe me?”

She nodded again, and he lightly stroked her inner arm.

“We’ll have more babies,” she said quietly.

“Lots more. Fifty more.”

“You’re giving birth to half of them.”

“I can try.”

And finally, she managed a smile.


*****


“So can I go home?”

“Shortly. There is still something we need to discuss.”

“Take my medicine, drink fluids, and bed rest?”

“Well, there is that, yes. But there’s something you need to know.”

“What is it?”

“The trauma to your stomach was very severe. It damaged a few organs, even caused some internal bleeding. We were very fortunate, managed to patch you up nicely. And you seem to have some fast healing skills.”

“Okay…”

“But your uterus got the worst of it. The fetus-”

“Don’t.”

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Summers, but-”

“Look, just say it. I don’t want details, or pussyfooting.”

“Your uterus was damaged beyond repair.”

“What does that mean? Are you saying…I can’t…”

“I’m very sorry. We tried everything we could, but it was a very bad injury.”

“I’ll never get pregnant again?”

“There are still options. There are surrogate mothers, adoption. This isn’t the end of the world.”

“No. It’s not.”


*****


Angel brought Buffy home the next day. She didn’t speak at all in the car, nor when they went inside. She couldn’t climb stairs, so he helped her into the living room and lowered her onto the sofa.

“Are you hungry? I can fix us some lunch.”

“I’m fine.”

“Willow called. She and Giles are flying in tomorrow morning. Should get here around noon.”

She nodded.

“Dawn’s coming later tonight, after Phil gets home, so he can watch Jena.”

Another nod.

“Do you want a blanket?”

“I’m fine.”

“Buffy, would you at least look at me?”

She finally raised her eyes to his, and he took a step back. The empty, lifeless stare was so out of place on her beautiful face that she looked like a different person.

“Hey,” he managed, kneeling next to her. “It’s going to be all right. I promise. I know things look awful now. I know that,” he stressed. “But we still have options. Like the doctor said, this isn’t the end of the world.”

“I can’t have children,” she said flatly. “My entire purpose as a woman is gone. I might as well have let the vamp kill me.”

“No,” Angel said angrily. “Never say that.”

“I’m going to take a bath,” she said, pushing him away as he offered help.

“You shouldn’t-”

“I’m fine.”


*****


The following day, Angel went to visit Giles at his hotel room. When Angel and Giles returned to the house, they found Willow’s rental car in the driveway, the open trunk full of groceries.

Inside the house, Buffy was putting a bag of frozen vegetables in the freezer when she heard the front door slam, and then Angel’s voice calling her name.

A small child of around age four came running into the kitchen. It was obvious, even if you’d never met her, that it was Willow’s daughter. The bright red hair pulled back in a french braid and the bright green eyes mirrored the older woman’s exactly.

Throwing herself into Willow’s arms, she shrieked, “Mommy!”

Willow picked her daughter up and hugged her, her eyes quickly going to look at Buffy’s face. She was smiling at the little girl, but her eyes gave away the hurt.

“Hey, sweetie. Did you have fun with Daddy?”

“Uh-huh. We watched TV and ate popcorn.”

“At 10 in the morning. Nice,” Willow said, raising her eyes to her husband who still stood in the doorway. He took his glasses off to clean them, looking anywhere but at the fiery redhead.

“Tara, do you remember Aunt Buffy?”

The little girl looked over at the blonde, and nodded shyly. Buffy walked over, smiling, and said, “You’ve gotten so big. How old are you now?”

“Four.”

“Wow. You look just like your mommy.”

“Thank you,” she said, politely, resting her head on Willow’s shoulder.

Angel watched this scene closely, and he could see how difficult all of this was for her. He moved forward, and Buffy said, “I have something upstairs for the kids. I bought them for Christmas and was waiting for you to come back to the states. I’ll be right back.”

She quickly stepped around her husband and headed towards the stairs.

“I’m going to make sure she’s okay,” he said to Giles and Willow, quickly following her.


*****


“Buffy?”

Angel entered the bedroom, but didn’t see his wife anywhere. The closet door was ajar, and there was a box of wrapped gifts sitting in the doorway.

Walking to the bathroom, he found her leaning against the sink, a pill bottle in her hand and her eyes closed. Coming up behind her, he wrapped his arms tentatively around her waist. Meeting no resistance, he pulled her gently to him, resting his chin on top of her head.

“Are you okay?”

“Fine.”

“Do you want me to tell them to come back later?”

“No. I just need a minute.”

She finally opened her eyes, and met his in the mirror. For an instant, Angel saw a spark of something he couldn’t quite place in those hazel depths, but she quickly looked away and pulled out of his embrace.

“Can you get the box of presents?”

“Sure.”

She left the bathroom. Angel studied his reflection for a moment, then followed suit.


*****


“Well, I see you’ve kept in shape.”

Buffy smiled at Giles, reaching an arm out to pull him to his feet.

“It was your idea to do this, remember? I figured you get your fill of beatings training the girls in England.”

Grabbing a towel to wipe his face, Giles replied, “It’s been years since we’ve sparred. I thought it would be a good idea to check your abilities.” Unstrapping the protective gear and stretching his sore muscles, he muttered, “Seemed a good idea at the time.”

Watching Giles remove the padding, Buffy was hit with a rush of nostalgia. Sitting down on a chair near the bay window, she studied him quietly.

“What is it?” he asked, noticing her far away look.

“Nothing. Just thinking about the good old days.”

“Apocalypses and monsters?”

“Among other things.”

Sitting down next to her, he said, “Things were relatively simple then, weren’t they? In retrospect, at least.”

“Mmm. Wish I’d appreciated it more.”

Giles frowned.

“Your life is good, Buffy. Angel loves you. You have a wonderful house, a wonderful husband, and a good 40 wonderful years yet to spend on this earth together. You don’t have to fight demons, or even train anymore.”

“I know that. I know all of that. My life is fine.”

“Then what is it?”

Buffy shook her head, not trusting her own voice.

“There are children born everyday to parents who do not appreciate them. You and Angel have a wondrous opportunity to take one of them in and make them your own. This is not the end of-”

“Giles, STOP!”

Taken aback, he stared at her. Her eyes, full of tears and fury, stared into his own.

“Everyone keeps saying that! ‘It’s not the end of the world.’ No, it isn’t! I’ve been there, several times. This is worse!”

Standing up, she furiously wiped at her eyes.

“I am broken and dead inside. I can’t even look at my husband without wanting to cry. Is this what he became human for?”

“Angel earned his humanity, and the first thing he did was find you. Not because you could bear him children, but because he wanted to spend his life with you.”

“And look how well that turned out.”

“I know you feel this way now, but once you give yourself time to heal, you’ll see that it will get better. You just have to give it time.”

Buffy’s hands were clenched into fists, and she refused to look at him.

“Willow will be waiting for you back at your hotel. You should go.”

“Buffy-”

“Go, Giles. Please.”

And without looking back at him, she left the room.


*****


Months had passed since Buffy had lost the baby, and there was little change. Though she now slept in the same bed as Angel, she wouldn’t let him touch her, and she refused to see a therapist. Angel was at his wits’ end.

Coming home early from work one day, he found her sitting on their bed in her bathrobe, sobbing into her hands.

Tentatively, he walked towards the bed and kneeled in front of her. Looking up at him, she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his neck.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”

“Buffy, it’s okay. Shh,” he said, rubbing her back. “Please don’t cry, baby. It’s okay.”

Not used to the endearment, Buffy cried harder.

“I don’t want you to waste your humanity on me, Angel,” she whispered.

“Never. Wasting it would be living my life without you.”

Sitting up and resting her forehead against his, she took a deep breath and said, “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t. We’ll get through this, Buffy. We’ll get through it together.”

Closing her eyes again, he saw more tears fall, and he kissed her eyelids. Moving her hands behind his head, she kissed him, a real kiss like he hadn’t received since before the loss of the baby.

“Make love to me? Please?”

“Buffy, are you sure…”

“Please, Angel. I need you.”

Pulling off his coat, he pulled her into his arms, kissing her more passionately and moving them both up on the bed.

He made love to her gently, kissing her desperately and whispering soothing words in her ear. She held him tightly, as though she was afraid to let go of him.

Afterwards he held her close, kissing her forehead and smoothing her hair. She rested her head against his chest, lightly running her fingers over his smooth skin.

“I love you, Buffy.”

Reaching up to run her fingers over his face, she smiled at him and said, “I love you, too. So much.”

Pulling the blanket up over them, Angel sighed contentedly. Buffy curled up against him, her head resting above his heart. For the first time in months, Angel felt complete again.


*****


When Angel woke the next morning, Buffy’s side of the closet was empty. Not wanting to believe what he was seeing, he flew down the stairs and into the kitchen. Sun poured through the windows, but his wife was not sitting at the kitchen table with coffee like he’d expected. Instead, he found a note lying on the counter.

Don’t look for me.

His hands shaking so badly that he dropped the scrap of paper, Angel buried his hands in his hair and let out a howl of pain.


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Feline Repose

Author: Venus Blue
Written: July 12, 2004
Pairing: None. Mentions of Olivia/Giles
Rating: G
Summary: What does an unemployed librarian do with his time?
Feedback: If you have to ask, you've never written a story before.
Distribution: At my site, The Bunny Warren. Probably FF.net, if I get really bored. Any lists who archive. Anyone who wants, please ask. I haven't said no yet.
Dedication: To Gloss, who is my ultimate Giles inspiration, and to Midnight. Thank you for keeping this Gentlewoman of Leisure occupied.
Awards: View award, View 2nd award, View 3rd award, View 4th award, View 5th award, View 6th award, View 7th award

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What does an unemployed librarian do with his time?

Giles find himself questioning that more and more as the blistering weeks of summer roll along.

He is quite thoroughly unemployed now. Banished by the Council. He supposed “voluntary leave” suited his departure from Sunnydale High quite nicely, if not ironically.

He wasn’t terribly concerned about his finances; he had a decent amount of money stored away in savings and bonds. Boredom, however, and a deep loathing of staying still for too long, was beginning to set in.

The children all had better things to do. Buffy was in L.A. visiting her father, Willow and Oz hadn’t been seen for weeks, and Xander was traveling parts unknown.

It was only the second week of July, and Giles already missed them.

He’d taken to going for long walks through town. Sunnydale was growing and expanding almost every day, and he took the time to discover places he’d never seen before.

It was on one such outing that he discovered the park. It was quiet, with a few trees and a long stretch of green grass, benches, and a well-kept gazebo.

Despite the bright summer weather, the park was relatively uncrowded, and it was far enough from the main road to be peaceful.

It became a daily excursion for him, packing a light lunch and a book, and sitting for hours in the cool comfort of the gazebo.

It was during one of these quiet moments that Giles first spotted the cat.

He really was nothing more than a scrap of fur and a tail. Terribly scrawny, with the tip of one ear missing. At first glance, Giles thought it a pure black cat, and he allowed his mind to think on superstition and bad luck. Then the feline reared up on his hind legs to swat at a bug, and Giles spotted the long white streak running along his belly.

Maybe not such bad luck after all.

The cat never paid him much attention, though on occasion Giles did look up from his book to find those large yellow eyes trained on him, as though the cat was sizing him up.

In the beginning, it kept its distance, usually moving among the trees in search of squirrels or insects. But eventually as the days went on, Giles saw it grew bolder, venturing to the covered gazebo steps to sniff around and see what this now regular visitor was all about.

Slowly reaching into his bag, Giles removed the ham and cheese sandwich he’d fixed for himself before leaving the house. The cat studied him curiously, his stance making it abundantly clear he was ready to run if necessary.

Pulling the sandwich apart, he ripped one half into smaller pieces. Throwing gently, he aimed it toward the stairs. The cat’s eyes dilated, but he stood his ground, moving forward to sniff at the bread and meat.

“Go on,” Giles said softly. His voice was hoarse and scratchy, and he found himself wondering just how long he’d gone without speaking to another human being.

The cat wolfed down the sandwich hungrily, his neck moving rapidly as he fought to swallow.

Giles watched quietly, his forehead rumpled in a frown. He found himself sympathizing with this poor creature. Unwanted, and so cautious of being hurt.

Standing slowly, he moved forward, crouching down to pet his head.

The cat fled.

********************

Before going to the park the next day, Giles stopped at the grocery near his house. He thought it a moot point; he assumed he’d scared the cat off for good.

But he hoped he was wrong.

Sitting down on the steps rather than the bench of the gazebo, Giles set his book beside him and removed his lunch from the brown paper bag. Slowly and carefully observing his surroundings, Giles’ heart fell. The cat was nowhere to be seen.

Finishing his sandwich and putting the cellophane into the bag, Giles sighed and picked up his book. Opening it to the bookmark’ed page, Giles began reading.

Two paragraphs down, he heard it. A loud scratching, and an audible “thud”. Glancing up quickly, he saw his friend, shaking his head rapidly with bits of leaf and twig stuck in his fur.

“Watching me from the tree, eh?” he said quietly. The cat looked at him with an almost bored expression.

Reaching into his bag, Giles removed a small package, wrapped in white paper. Unwrapping it, he set it at the foot of the steps and slowly backed away to the bench of the gazebo

The approach was slow, cautious as always. Keeping a close watch on Giles, the cat sniffed at the fish, his stance guarded and tense. Giles looked down at this book, watching from the corner of his eye.

Apparently finding no ill motive, he ate the meal, wolfing it down without another glance at the strange man.

And so a relationship was built. Giles stopped each day for fresh fish before heading to the spot, and each day the cat was waiting for him.

After awhile, the feline stuck around, cleaning himself on the stairs before stretching out luxuriously in the sun.

When he wasn’t resting or chasing prey, he sat, his back straight with the graceful posture only a cat possesses, and watched Giles with his large stern eyes and serious expression. He never drew near, and Giles never risked contact.

Then one day, in the late days of August, Giles threw caution to the wind. He set the fresh fish, cod this time, in the freshly mowed grass, and sat to one side of it, his back against the gazebo walls.

The cat sat under his usual tree, seemingly weighing out his options. He sauntered over to the package, sniffed it, then sat down, eyes on Giles again.

“Well?” he asked quietly.

He got a narrow-eyed glare for that before the tomcat started on his meal. This time Giles watched him eat, his book unopened on his lap.

When the last remnants of meat had been licked from the paper, the cat cleaned his paws and face, then stretched out only a few inches from Giles’ loafers.

A grasshopper suddenly landed near his leg, apparently roused from rest when the grass was cut. Golden eyes locked on it, ears became flat, and an attack stance was taken.

He was still for so long that when he finally did pounce, Giles laughed aloud in surprise. The cat paid him no mind as it bounced up on hind legs and twisted, playing with the insect.

After a few minutes of batting it around, the cat bit down on it. Giles frowned, and found himself saying, “Don’t do that, you don’t know where it’s been.”

He never thought a cat could look patronizing until that moment.

When the grasshopper ceased movement, ergo amusement, the cat lay back down, this time nearer to Giles’ right arm.

Hesitating for a split second, Giles reached forward, slowly stroking the soft fur between his ears. To his extreme surprise and relief, the cat did not run, nor did it hiss. It leaned into the touch, eyes closed as though in bliss.

The sat like that for some time before Giles’ arm grew tired from being stretched. Pulling his arm back to rest the muscle for a moment, he was surprised once more when his hand was followed.

The cat glared at him, apparently annoyed by the ceased affection. Leaning over his lap slightly, it head-butted his hand, making certain that Giles knew who was boss around here. Laughing, Giles resumed his strokes, alternately scratching under his chin and behind his ears.

When the time came for Giles to leave, he gathered his things slowly. Pulling his uneaten sandwich into several pieces, he laid them on the paper, giving his friend one last pet before departing.

“See you tomorrow,” he said quietly.

********************

“Rupert?”

“Yes?” Giles said into the phone, trying to place the soft female voice.

“It’s Olivia.”

“Olivia! My goodness, how long has it been?”

“Too long. Listen, I’m going to be in California tomorrow, and I was wondering-”

********************

By the time Olivia’d returned to England, and things with Buffy quieted down again, a number of weeks had passed. That was when Giles remembered his feline friend.

He arrived at the park late one afternoon, just before dusk. He sat by the gazebo, and unwrapped the fish, quietly waiting.

The cat never appeared.

And though he returned many times during the next few rather lonely months, he never saw him again.

He told himself that it was a stray, after all. He had no business feeding it in the first place, nor growing attached.

But on occasion, during some unguarded moment in the day, he remembered those large bright eyes and lean build, and he couldn’t help the pangs of guilt and regret that passed through him.


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Going For Tea

Author: Venus Blue
Written: 2001
Summary: What exactly did Faith do in between the time she peered through Giles' window to spy on the Scoobies, and then meeting up with Buffy and Willow on campus in "This Year's Girl"?
Pairing: Faith/Graham
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers: Come on people, it’s PWP. Like there’s boo koo spoilers in a freaking PWP.
Feedback: Always most welcome.
Disclaimer: You know the drill. Joss the almight holier-than-us one owns everything, I own nothing but a cheap pair of shoes and some broken sunglasses.
Dedication: Yeah, Ry, I finally got around to it. You better damn well appreciate it, too! ;)
Awards: View, View 2nd Award, View 3rd Award


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"Gimme a whiskey. Double."

Willy eyed the customer at his bar dubiously. Their type was never welcome around the demons, and they only ended up causing him more problems.

"Just give me the damn drink."

Willy sighed and pulled the bottle from behind the bar, and poured the dark liquid into a relatively clean glass, sliding it across the bar.

Graham scooped it up, and quickly downed it. He’d had a rough day, after barely managing to take down a very large and very slimy Rikafad demon, and then narrowly escaping a Buffy/Riley make out fest. He could skip the vomit that day.

"Double shot of whiskey, eh? I like a man who can handle his alcohol."

Looking to his left, Graham cocked an eyebrow at the beautiful woman who sat down next to him. She was incredibly beautiful, if not a little pale. Long brown hair, full dark lips, and the nicest breasts he’d seen in a long time. She grinned at him knowingly, and said, "I’m Faith."

"Graham."

She lightly clinked her glass against his, and then proceeded to down it in one gulp.

Graham chuckled a little and called to Willy, "Another round for the lady. What are you drinking?"

"Same as you, Handsome."

Graham attempted to hide his smile as the bartender refilled both of their glasses.

It started out with innocent flirting then headed to friendly competition to see who could outdrink the other. Graham could hold his own, but he couldn’t believe how much alcohol the girl could keep down.

When Willy finally threw everyone out, they were both stumbling and giggling like thirteen-year olds. They made their way through Sunnydale in search of a liquor store, when suddenly a very tall, very burly looking vampire stepped in front of them, fangs bared.

It took Graham two milliseconds to respond to the HST, but Faith was even quicker. In a flash, she’d thrown the vamp on the ground, pounding the living hell out of it. Graham stared stupidly for a few minutes, then pulled his trusty stake from his waistband.

"Faith, heads up," he called, tossing the stake in her direction. With barely a glance backwards, she grabbed it in mid air, and slammed it into the vamp's heart, turning him to dust.

Jumping back up, she said, "That was fun."

Graham was shocked to see this relatively small girl stake a vamp without even breaking a sweat, but his alcohol-ridden mind was too far gone to question it.

Faith felt that low-down tingle start to rise, and she eyed Graham appreciatively.

"So…you hungry?"

…………………

When they reached Graham’s room, they were like wild animals. Tearing at each other’s clothing, licking, nipping, and full-out biting each other in their fight to undress and get to the bed as quickly as possible.

Graham gripped the back of Faith’s neck, his tongue dueling with hers as he fought to lay her down on the bed. Before he knew what had happened, Faith had him turned around, and he felt himself fall backwards, his back hitting the soft cotton bedspread and down pillows. She sat on his torso, her hands going into his hair as she came dangerously close to knocking his tonsils down his throat.

Graham wrapped his hands around her waist, and deftly rolled them until she was beneath him. She growled, and he laughed, pulling at her shirt until she raised up to allow him to pull it completely off.

Gripping her soft but firm breasts in his hands, he lowered his mouth to one of her nipples, gently nibbling at it until she was writhing beneath him. He bit down, causing her to scream in pleasure and arch her back, sending her sex straight up against his throbbing cock. Graham groaned, and moved to the other nipple, giving it much the same treatment. Throwing her head back, Faith grabbed the headboard, digging her nails into the wood as pleasure wracked her body.

Moving lower, he unzipped her pants, sliding them down her curves until he was face to face with her now completely wet pussy. He shot a glance up at her face, where she was still, waiting impatiently.

Planting kisses up her inner thighs, he held them tightly in place, fearing she would crush his skull if she clamped them shut. Faith moaned, grabbing his head and trying to force him where she most wanted to go. This, of course, made him skip that exact spot and move to her other thigh.

Pushing herself up on her elbows, Faith looked at Graham, who glanced up to see the rather impatient look on the brunette’s face. Grinning, he buried his tongue in her pussy, causing her to gasp and throw herself backwards, driving her crotch into his hungry mouth.

He licked up and down her lips, not wanting to waste a single drop of her juices. Judging by the moans and groans he was dragging from her, she didn’t want him to waste a drop either.

He continued to work his tongue over her, savoring her flavor and inhaling her scent, until she thought she’d burst. Then he affixed his lips to her clit, and she screamed as her entire body shook with her orgasm.

Working his way back up her body, he smiled at her, and was amazed when she ran her tongue over his lips and chin, cleaning her own juices off his face. Grinning, she pushed him down on the bed, biting the buttons off his T-shirt and running her hands up his strong muscular stomach. She ground her hips into his crotch, making him groan and buck upwards, sending his denim-clad erection straight into her already throbbing clit. Moaning, she circled his bellybutton with her tongue, dipping inside before continuing.

Graham looked down and watched in fascination as she unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans using only her teeth, then nearly castrated him as she viciously ripped off his jeans. When she saw the size of his cock, her eyes got wide, and she ran her tongue across her lips.

"You’ve been holding out on me, honey," she murmured, running a fingernail lightly up the side of his throbbing cock. He hissed and bucked his hips, wanting more than just a glancing touch. Lightly, she licked the very tip of his cock, never putting too much pressure at once. Groaning in frustration, he grabbed the headboard to keep from pushing her head down onto his cock.

Knowing what he was doing, Faith acted like she was going to make another light swipe, then proceeded to take his entire cock into her mouth, feeling the tip touch the back of her throat and continue down. Graham let out a yell, and fought to keep from bucking his hips straight up off the bed. Just when he thought it couldn’t get better, she began to bob her head, sucking him in all the way to the base of her throat, and then letting all but the tip out. As her tongue worked all the sensitive spots on his cock, one hand gripped the base while the other fingered his balls, using one finger to rub the sensitive spot underneath.

Knowing he wasn’t going to last much longer, but not wanting the amazing sensation of her hot mouth to end, Graham reached down and lightly pulled on her hair. She looked up, and he grabbed her shoulders, flipping her over and entering her in one thrust. They both moaned loudly, Faith’s legs wrapping tightly around his torso as he thrust into her roughly, causing her to moan and grind her pelvis into him, her fingernails digging into his back and drawing blood.

Feeling himself coming closer and closer to the edge, he slipped his hand between their bodies and found her clit, massaging it and causing her to shake and scream in pleasure, her orgasm hitting her hard. The clenching of her pussy walls was too much for Graham, and he followed her, spilling his hot semen into her, his face buried in her neck.

Breathing heavily, he withdrew, falling flat on his back beside her, every muscle in his body quivering like Jell-O.

After a few minutes, Faith sat up and began collecting her scattered clothing.

"What are you doing?" he asked, confused.

"Gotta go. Got things to do."

"Wait. Don’t go."

"Sorry, but I’ve got places to be."

"At 4:00 in the morning?"

She glanced at the clock on the bedside table, and it suddenly hit her that she had no place to go.

"Come on, you can stay here. Or at least grab a shower first."

Smiling, she leaned over, resting her hands on the mattress, her large breasts hanging directly in his face.

"Care to join me?"

…………………

The water was scalding hot by the time he joined Faith. He hissed, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him passionately.

"You certainly are the insatiable one, aren’t you?"

Grinning, she ran a soap-filled sponge over his chest and torso, loving the feel of his hard abs. She suckled on his earlobe as she washed his neck and arms, then spun him around to get his back. As the water washed the soap away from his taught body, a wicked smile crossed her face and she pushed him gently yet firmly against the shower wall, sliding down to her knees to wash his legs.

Graham rested his hands against the wall, closing his eyes as he felt her hands work his over-relaxed muscles. Her hands moved over his tight cheeks, and he realized she wasn’t holding the sponge anymore.

"What are you-"

"Shh," she murmured. "Just go along for the ride."

She ran kisses along the back of his upper thighs, massaging him gently to prepare him for what was coming. Steadily moving upward, she gently parted the cheeks of his ass, running her tongue between them.

Graham gasped in pleasure, and felt his legs wobble precariously beneath him. Gripping his upper thighs firmly, Faith continued her onslaught, causing him to lean his head against the wall and moan as previously unknown sensations wracked his body.

Letting go of one of his thighs, she slipped a hand between her own legs, rubbing her still swollen clit.

"F-faith," he managed. "I need…I need to be inside of you."

Grinning, she pulled away, and he turned around, pulling her up and spinning her around. Leaning over, Faith rested her hands against the shower wall, and he entered her from behind, burying himself in her heat and pausing a moment to regain his strength.

Turning her head, she flashed him a grin and said, "Not tired out already, are you?"

A mischievous look flashed through his eyes, and he said, "Those are fighting words."

"Bring it on."

Slapping her on the ass, he thrust into her once, and she threw her head back, her wet hair flying. Grabbing a handful of those long locks, he proceeded to pound into her, occasionally giving her a light smack, which only made her moan louder. Each time, he increased the pressure of the slap, and soon she was in the middle of the biggest orgasm yet.

When it died down, he withdrew, and she turned her head in surprise.

"Stand up," he managed to say, his cock still painfully erect. She leaned up against the wall, and raised one limber leg up to his shoulder. He held it there, and drove his cock back up into her, pushing her up against the wall for support. Faith’s cries got louder as he pounded into her quick and hard, driving her crazy with lust and pleasure.

He could tell she was on the verge of yet another orgasm, and he slid the hand around her waist down, sliding one finger up her ass. She screamed in orgasm, and shuddered around his cock, driving him to his own.

Somehow, they managed to get cleaned up and dried off, then lay in bed, the smell of sex still fresh in the room.

"So what was this important business you have to attend to?" Graham asked, stroking her almost dry hair.

"Oh, it can wait until tomorrow," Faith muttered, already half asleep.

~The End

Shades of Grey


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Here's to Forever

Author: Venus Blue
Written: December, 19, 2004
Summary: Written for peppery_lime in the Livejournal Slash Wedding Ficathon. She wanted Xander/Oz, leather pants, a frosting fight, and a sweet, tender kiss. Hopefully I didn’t slaughter them too much.
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Not mine. Joss, Mutant, 20th, etcetera.
Author’s Notes: Don’t know what I’d do without Meltha to hold my hand and beta for me. Also, major love to Gloss for trying to assure me her Xander/Oz wouldn’t kick my Xander/Oz’s ass. Additional notes at the bottom.
Awards: View award

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“You ever think about getting married?”

It was a casual sentence, said in a casual tone. Oz watched, amused, as Xander blinked once, twice, third time’s the charm before managing, “What?”

“Ever think about getting married?”

Xander stuffed the last piece of quesadilla into his mouth and rose to put his plate in the sink. Oz watched him go, waiting patiently.

“Sure, I’ve thought about it. I came damn near close with Anya, you know that.”

“I meant now. You and me.”

Xander was still staring. He seemed to be waiting for the punch line.

“Which one of us would wear the dress?”

“Well, I have the legs for it.”

Xander rinsed his plate and set it in the dishwasher. Oz was used to this, distraction before response. He knew to wait.

“You serious?”

“Yeah.”

Leaning back against the sink, Xander tapped his foot nervously.

“Not much of a proposal, really.”

“You want me on one knee, flowers and heart-shaped ring box?”

“I like the knees part.”

Oz smiled and came around the table, pulling him by the belt loop and kissing him longingly. Xander wrapped an arm around his waist, stroking the small of his back and nibbling Oz’s lower lip as he pulled the hair at the base of his neck.

Pulling away, Oz reached into his pocket and knelt in front of him.

“Xander, you wanna marry me?”

The deer-in-the-headlights look was enough to make anyone laugh, but Oz kept his face impassive as always.

“You really mean this?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Well, unless our fearless leader was impeached when I had my back turned, it’s not legal.”

“Doesn’t have to be legal. Just has to be real. To us.”

“You really want to put up with me forever?”

“I’ve put up with you for the last five years, and then before that. Think I can take forty or so more.”

Xander stared at the simple gold band encased in black velvet, his mind racing with thoughts and fears at the ramification of its purpose. He’d lost the need to continuously talk all the time, a habit he’d had all his life, but he’d never been as speechless as he felt at that moment.

“Knee’s getting kinda sore.”

Taking a deep breath, Xander said, “But what will we name the children?”

Oz did laugh then, standing and grabbing him for another kiss.

*********************

“Think we should’ve eloped?”

Oz raised his arms as the tailor’s tape measure came around.

“Might’ve been a good plan.”

Willow pulled a book from the huge pile she’d been digging through and exclaimed, “Found it! Flowers! We need to discuss flowers!”

“Flowers?” Xander asked incredulously.

“For the ceremony! Oh, and catering for the reception! Oz, are you still allergic to shellfish?”

“Well-”

“And you want a chocolate cake, right? Did you want white or dark icing?”

“Um-”

“And I was thinking, since you’re both wearing black tuxes, how about a white-”

“Willow,” Xander said, wincing as the seamstress poked him with a pin. “Take a deep breath. Or ten.”

Smiling, she said, “But this is so exciting! I totally arranged Buffy and Giles’ wedding, and they loved it! And now I get to do yours and I really like this and I was thinking maybe I could-”

“Again, breathe, Will,” Oz said, stepping down from the box and watching the tailor finish up Xander. “How soon are these going to be done?”

“End of the week. Monday tops.”

“Great. We’ll call.”

The men helped Willow carry the books out her car (“How’d you manage to get all of these in there?”), and she asked, “You guys want to grab lunch?”

Xander and Oz exchanged looks, and Oz shrugged.

“Sure, why not?”

Over lunch at Xander’s favorite fast food restaurant, Willow kept up a running chatter.

“So, are you two going to want this in a church?”

“We’re inviting Spike and Angel.”

“So, no church. No outdoors, unless…nighttime wedding?”

“Not wanting to face unexpected demons.”

“True. Are you going to use a Justice of the Peace?”

“We hadn’t thought that far.”

“Have you thought of…anything?”

Xander smirked, taking a big bite of his hamburger, and Oz said, “Not so much.”

“What about a best man? Or, um, men?”

“Uh…I guess I could ask Dev. Xander?”

“Will? Wanna be my best man? Again?”

Her grin widened, and she said, “Sure!” Then after a moment, “Can I pick the dress?”

*********************

Buffy and Giles flew into LAX two weeks before the wedding, and Buffy immediately pulled Xander to one side.

“You let Willow plan your wedding? Are you insane?”

“Starting to feel like it.”

Hoisting her bag up on her shoulder, she walked towards the luggage claim, one arm through Xander’s.

“She’s been wedding crazed ever since she and Riley moved in together! Don’t you remember my wedding? The flowers, the hors d'oeuvres, the ice sculptures?”

“Ah, the giant ice replica of Mister Gordo. How could I forget?”

“And it was right next to the roasting pig! Whenever I even began to say something, she would shush me!”

“Well, it’s too late now. We’re in way over our heads.”

“Where is she now?”

“Scouting out places for the wedding with Oz.”

Buffy shook her head as they met up with Giles, who was surrounded by suitcases and struggling with another from the conveyor.

“A little help, dear?” he asked, winded.

“I’ll get a luggage cart.”

Xander eyed the bags and said, “Traveling light?”

“Only three of these are mine. One is entirely shoes.”

Xander clapped the older man on the back and said, “Married life is great, huh?”

Giles chuckled and said, “Actually, it is. You’re ready for your own?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be. Not gonna screw up like last time.”

Smiling sadly, Giles said, “I’m sure you won’t.”

Buffy returned, and they proceeded to pile up the luggage.

*********************

“Did you ask Giles?”

Xander ran a towel over his hair and said, “No, I thought you were going to.”

Oz looked up from his guitar thoughtfully.

“Just figured it would be easier for you to ask him.”

Pulling on a pair of sweatpants, Xander sat next to him on the bed, folding his legs Indian-style.

“Don’t you think he’d rather hear it from you?”

Oz shrugged and set his guitar by the bedside table. Leaning forward, he combed his fingers through Xander’s damp hair, pushing it away from his eyes. Xander leaned into the touch, covering Oz’s hand with his own. Kissing him gently, he asked, “Scared?”

Oz smiled and said, “Maybe a little.”

Kissing him more intently, Xander pushed him back onto the bed, holding the back of his head with one hand and gently scratching his lower belly with the other.

“Love you.”

“Love you, Xan.”

Unbuckling Oz’s belt and sliding his pants down, Xander paused.

“Think we should wait until we’re married?”

Oz lifted his head and cocked an eyebrow.

*********************

Xander and Buffy had gone to pick up the tuxes, and Giles was fixing himself some lunch when there was a knock at the hotel door. Opening it, he found Oz, hands tucked in his pockets, fidgeting slightly.

“Oz. What a pleasant surprise, come in.”

They went into the kitchen, where Giles fixed Oz a cup of tea and offered him a sandwich.

“We don’t have much. Buffy went with Willow a few days ago to get a few essentials.”

“I’m good, thanks. Had a question for you, actually.”

They sat at the small kitchen table, and Oz gripped the hot mug, admiring the 70’s-esque tablecloth pattern.

“Xander and I were talking, and we were wondering if you’d mind performing the ceremony.”

Giles looked startled for a moment, then said, “Well, I’ve no experience in that. I’m not a priest, or judge.”

“Yeah, but it’s not going to be a traditional legal ceremony. We just…”

He paused, and Giles cleared his throat.

“Xander knows?”

“About us?” Oz asked, looking up finally. “Yeah, he knows. He understands it was a long time ago. We both think it should be you who, you know. Officiates.”

“I would be honored.”

Oz smiled, and finally took a sip of his tea.

“Does Buffy know?”

“She does. She took it quite well, considering.”

“And the two of you? How’s marriage?”

“Better than I would’ve thought.”

“Always knew you two would end up together.”

Giles chuckled softly.

“I had my doubts.”

They sat in comfortable silent for a few minutes before Giles asked, “And you? I never saw you as the marrying kind.”

“Yeah, me neither, to be honest. Devon still thinks it’s this big prank I’m playing on him.”

“Should make for an interesting ceremony.”

Oz laughed softly and ducked his head.

“Me and Xander…I don’t know. It just…feels right. Like this was supposed to happen or something.”

“Soul mates?”

“Wouldn’t go that far. Like…kismet? Maybe?”

“Perhaps.”

Oz glanced at his watch and said, “I’d better get going. I have to get some stuff for dinner tonight, and I want to at least have it started when Xander gets home.”

Giles walked him to the door, and Oz shifted from foot to foot before sticking out his hand. Giles shook it firmly and said, “Well, I’ll see you later, then.”

“Yeah, me and Xander will be over to talk about the ceremony.”

“Goodbye, Daniel.”

“Bye, Giles.”

*********************

“You’re really going through with this.”

Oz straightened his tie and said, “Yep.”

“Dude, you’re such a chick.”

“Just put the suit on, Dev.”

Willow came in then, eyes shining.

“Devon, why aren’t you dressed? The ceremony starts in half an hour!”

“I got time.”

Oz turned to Willow and asked, “Is Xander ready?”

“Yeah, Buffy’s helping him right now. You look great!”

“Thanks. What about Giles?”

“He’s talking to the photographer.”

“Everything going smoothly?”

“Uh-huh,” Willow said slowly. “Oz, are you nervous?”

Holding up one shaking hand, Oz shrugged and said, “Little bit.”

Willow grabbed his hands in hers and squeezed them reassuringly.

“You’re going to be fine, I promise. Not having second thoughts, are you?”

“Nah. Just…don’t want to make a fool of myself.”

“Xander’s probably going through the same thing. Don’t worry.”

*********************

“Xander, give me the bottle.”

“But I need it.”

“No, you really don’t. And you’re going to get it on your tux.”

Xander reluctantly handed over the chocolate syrup, and Buffy set it back on the mini fridge. Handing Xander a spoon, they both dug into the large bowl of chocolate ice cream. Buffy passed him a napkin and warned, “No dripping. Willow will slaughter me.”

“Mm-hmm.”

They clicked spoons and Buffy said, “How’re your nerves?”

“The ice cream’s helping. A little.”

“Good. Not going to bolt out the door the second I turn my back, are you?”

Xander smiled and ducked his head.

“Nah. But any little old men with glowing orbs should be killed on the spot.”

“You got it.”

Giles stuck his head in and said, “Are you two almost ready?”

“Just getting in a last minute sugar rush.”

Moving to his wife, Giles kissed her forehead softly and said, “You look beautiful.”

“Thank you. Not too bad yourself.”

Smoothing his tux, Giles said, “And of course, Xander, you look handsome, as well.”

“What, no kiss for me?”

Giles cocked an eyebrow, and Xander and Buffy grinned.

“I do have to say thanks to you and Oz for the bridesmaids’ dresses. Much, much better this time around.”

“Well, I said it’d be convenient to use the same dresses, but Oz wanted the lavender.”

“And it’s appreciated,” Willow said, appearing in the doorway. “Ceremony’s in fifteen minutes. Everyone but Xander in the ballroom, please.”

Buffy kissed Xander’s cheek, and she and Giles filed out.

Willow grinned up at Xander and said, “You doing good?”

“Better than I expected.”

Willow hugged him tightly and said, “Gonna actually do it this time?”

“Think so. If I don’t pass out first.”

They hugged for a minute, Willow rubbing his back, then she said, “Oz is going to meet you in the hall in five minutes. Walk out when the music starts, got it?”

“Got it.”

One last squeeze and Willow walked out of the room. Xander looked at the clock, took a deep breath, and picked up the bowl of ice cream. There was a knock at the door, and Xander called, “Come in!”

Oz slipped in, and both men grinned at each other.

“Isn’t it bad luck for the bride to see the groom before the wedding?” Xander asked, moving to him.

“Which one of us is the bride?”

“Traditionally, probably the person who’s a bo-”

Pushing himself up, Oz kissed him, tangling his hand in his hair and squeezing his hip. Xander cupped Oz’s face and pulled him close, stroking his cheek.

Pulling away, gasping for air, Oz said, “Didn’t want to do that in front of everyone.”

Resting his forehead against the shorter man’s, Xander said, “You ready to get married?”

“As I’ll ever be.”

They left the hotel room and headed down the hall.

“About the reception…” Xander began.

“No frosting fight.”

“Damn.”

Squeezing his hand, Oz paused near the open double doors, waiting for their cue.

*********************

“A toast!”

The reception had been going for almost an hour when Willow tapped her champagne glass with her spoon.

“A toast to Xander and Oz, my two boys, whom I love so much. I hope you’re both happy and healthy for the rest of your lives, and that I never lose touch with either of you. And please do not hold the psycho wedding planner bit against me.”

Everyone laughed and raised their glasses in salute, and Xander and Oz walked over to her, hugging and kissing her in turn.

“So, did I do good?” Willow asked as the three of them moved to the buffet table.

“You did great, Will,” Xander said, popping a strawberry in his mouth. “All the insanity was well worth it.”

Willow looked immensely pleased with herself. Riley came up behind her, resting his chin on top of her head.

“Congratulations, guys.”

“Thanks, man,” Oz said, shaking his hand. “When are you two going to join the ranks?”

Willow blushed prettily, and Riley said, “Soon as she pops the question. I’m expecting a huge diamond.”

“Does that mean your parents pay?” Willow asked sweetly.

“Obviously, we need to discuss this further.”

They moved away, and Xander turned to Oz.

“Are we that cute?”

“We’re cuter.”

“Good to know,” Xander said, touching his forehead to Oz’s and kissing his nose.

“Alright, alright, none of that mushy shit,” Devon announced, draping his arms over both men’s shoulders.

“Has Willow seen you yet?” Oz asked, smiling over at Xander. “‘Cause you know she’s out for blood.”

“She’ll get over it.”

Xander looked down at Devon’s purple Converse and gold cummerbund.

“You do stand out in the crowd a little.”

“Man, I wore this to stand in my cousin’s wedding!”

“That was a Mardi Gras wedding, Dev. In New Orleans. On a float in the middle of a parade.”

“Hey, a wedding’s a wedding.”

“Devon!”

Devon turned and, spotting Willow coming his way, chirped, “Gotta go!” and ran for the exit, grabbing two glasses of champagne as he went. Willow scowled and asked, “You guys ready to cut the cake?”

“Is everyone done eating?” Oz asked curiously.

“No, but at least the cake will be ready for when they are.”

The men looked at each other, and Xander shrugged.

“Let’s do it.”

They walked to the elevated platform where the three-tiered wedding cake was situated. Picking up the sterling silver cake server, Xander asked, “Ready?”

Covering his hand, Oz said, “Yeah.”

Willow called for everyone’s attention, and the sudden light of a hundred flashbulbs blinded them both temporarily.

“I hope you can still see,” Oz muttered to Xander.

“Right eye’s seeing spots, but my left eye is perfectly unaffected.”

Oz chuckled softly and stroked his cheek.

“Benefits of having a glass eye, huh?”

“Okay, lovebirds, cut the cake already!” Spike yelled, earning him a thwap to the back of the head from Angel.

They cut into the cake finally, both bowing their heads to avoid the next wave of camera flashes. Extracting the slice, they each took a piece and looked each other.

Xander pouted for a half a second before lifting the piece to Oz’s mouth, holding his hand underneath to catch the crumbs. Oz smiled softly and pushed his hand down, raising his slice and tapping it against Xander’s lips. He opened, and Oz smeared it across his mouth, ending with a dab of frosting to the tip of his nose.

Xander looked positively frozen for a moment, then, grinning, he returned the favor, cupping Oz’s cheek afterwards with his frosting-covered hand and licking a bit of frosting off his chin.

The crowd laughed loudly, and applauded, and Oz wiped at his mouth.

“Now, if that doesn’t prove how much I love you…”

“It does,” Xander laughed, handing him a napkin. “It does.”

A server came up to begin cutting the cake for the guests, and Willow waved them down off the platform.

“It’s time for the first dance!” she said, wiping a smear of cake off Oz’s neck.

Xander groaned.

“Do I have to?”

“Come on! I only had to threaten death to get you two to pick a song. It won’t kill you to white-boy dance for three minutes.”

Grabbing his hand, Oz nodded towards the dance floor and said, “Come on, Xan. It won’t kill us.”

As the slow, soft country song that they’d finally settled on started, Xander and Oz stared at each other a moment before Oz wrapped his arms around Xander’s waist, and he wrapped his arms around Oz’s shoulders. They moved jerkily, and Xander said quietly, “This feels weird.”

“You’re thinking about it too much.”

“This feels like a high school dance. From hell. Where everyone is watching, waiting for you to trip.”

“So close your eyes.”

“Then I really will trip.”

“Close your eyes,” Oz said again, softly. “Just pretend we’re at home, in our living room. And we’re extremely drunk, so we felt like dancing.”

Xander smirked, then sighed loudly, closing his eyes. He felt Oz lean his head against his chest, his hands moving slowly up and down his back. Resting his cheek on Oz’s forehead, he counted to ten in his head to try to ease the being-watched anxiety.

Loosening his arms to release the tension, he pulled Oz closer, massaging his shoulder softly with one hand and moving them both in a slow, lazy circle.

“Am I leading?” he murmured.

“I hope so, because I’m not,” Oz said, squeezing him softly. Xander felt him peck softly at his cheek, and he turned his head, capturing his lips for a kiss.

“Guess what?” he whispered, pulling away.

“What?”

“We’re married.”

Oz chuckled.

“Yep.”

“That means I get half of your guitar if we get divorced.”

“I get half of your Twinkie stock.”

Xander laughed, leaning his head down and resting it on Oz’s shoulder.

“I love you,” Oz said into his ear.

“Love you, too.”

The song ended, and everyone clapped again.

“I love this crowd,” Xander said when the applause died down. “Feels like I’m winning an award, or I’m a celebrity.”

He was rewarded with more flashbulbs.

The reception eventually died down around 8:00 that night. Everyone came up to either shake hands with or hug Xander and Oz before leaving, and Willow was tyrannical about assuring they’d signed the guest book.

Xander and Oz were sitting at one of the tables, ties loosened and jackets off, when Willow came up to them.

“Looks like the party’s dying. I’m going to hang around, make sure the cleanup crew gets here. You guys go ahead to your room.”

“You sure?” Oz asked, removing his foot from Xander’s lap and sliding his shoe back on. “Because we can stay…”

“No, it’s fine. Buffy and Giles are going to wait with me. You guys enjoy your night.”

Xander stood, taking Oz’s hand to help him up, and moved to hug Willow again.

“You did a great job,” he said into her ear. “This was wonderful, and I love you.”

“Love you, too, Xan.”

She moved to Oz and hugged him as well.

“We really appreciated this, Will,” he said, smiling at Xander over her shoulder. “But when you and Riley get married? It’s our turn.”

She looked horrified, and Buffy laughed as she walked up. Reaching out, she hugged each man in turn, and said, “What are you two still doing down here? Get out of here. This is the boring part.”

“Where’s Giles?” Xander asked.

“He’s helping the DJ bring his equipment down to his van. I offered to help, but he insisted on doing it himself. He said to say goodnight to both of you, and congratulations.”

Oz took Xander’s hand, and they left the ballroom, heading to the elevator.

“It was a nice ceremony, wasn’t it?” Xander asked as Oz leaned back into him, resting his head on Xander’s shoulder.

“Very nice. And the reception was great. Good food.”

“Probably shouldn’t have listened to Spike when he insisted we open his present then and there.”

“I thought Angel was going to kill him on the spot.”

“There’s a couple destined for the altar if ever I saw one.”

Oz laughed an